Thoughts on Ben Sira

Ben Sira (also known as Ecclesiasticus or Sirach) is part of the Apocrypha, or more accurately the Deuterocanonical books of the Bible. I've only been in one Bible study that even mentioned this lovely collection of proverbs, wise sayings, advice and counsel to all types of people from physicians to fool. And the female leader (on video) of that class railed against the writer/translator as being a misogynist. Not so. It's a lovely book, and I really like the longer advice pieces. As far as being anti-female, what's wrong with this advice? It's directed at men and how they behave around women.

 
Chapter 9: 3 Keep away from other men's wives or they will trap you. 4 Don't keep company with female musicians; they will trick you. 5 Don't look too intently at a virgin, or you may find yourself forced to pay a bride price. 6 Don't give yourself to prostitutes, or you may lose everything you own. 7 So don't go looking about in the streets or wandering around in the run-down parts of town. 8 When you see a good-looking woman, look the other way; don't let your mind dwell on the beauty of any woman who is not your wife."

 
That advice would work in the 21st century.

But more to the point. If 7% of Sirach is addressed to problems with women, then that means the other 93% is addressed to problems with men. What do Paul and Jesus lay at the feet of men (to whom they were talking) Well, how about Mark 7: greed, malice, deceit, licentiousness, envy, arrogance, folly, evil thoughts, unchastity, theft, murder, adultery, and blasphemy for starters. Paul was just as straightforward as Jesus: Colossians 3: 8: "But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander and filthy language from your lips. "

Abraham was a liar; Noah was a drunkard; Moses lost his temper and killed a man; Elijah was despondent; David was an adulterer and murderer; Peter denied his Lord; Paul (Saul) chased down Christians and killed them. Thomas doubted. So, it seems the Bible doesn't always reflect well on men, yet they were all part of God's plan of redemption.

I don't recall where I read it, but Luther and Calvin didn't remove those 7 books from the Protestant canon. Later Reformers did that.

Things my grandfather used to say

Things my grandfather used to say: By Sean Dietrich (Sean of the South)

Be nice; because if you’re not being nice, what are you being?

Don’t cut in line. Don’t interrupt. Don’t pout. Never, ever take the last biscuit.

Smile, it increases your face value.

The wise man knoweth how to dumb it down.

You can’t think your way into the right action, but you can act your way into the right thinking.

Try your hardest, do your absolute best, and when all else fails, cuss.

Always obey your mother when she is around.

Everyone should pee in his own backyard at least once.

Listen to the elderly, they’re smarter than you. Unless they are men.

Treat other people the way you want to be treated. If the Golden Rule were actually practiced today, there would be no karaoke bars.

You never know what a consummate ass you can be until you give someone else advice.

Never judge a Denny’s menu by the photographs.

Let him who is without sin throw the first boomerang.

Whenever something stinks, check your own diaper first.

Don’t point fingers unless you're standing in front of a mirror.

Always, always, always trust your gut.

Tomorrow is a day with no mistakes in it, but you’ll change all that.

Be nice to kids, one day they’ll be running your nursing home.

Feed strays.

When in doubt, do it the way your wife told you.

Never pass up an opportunity to hold a baby.

A good wife always forgives her husband when she is wrong.

‘Fess up when you mess up. Admit when you’re wrong. Don’t gloat when you’re right. And above all, don’t act like you know everything. Know-it-alls make life so incredibly difficult for those of us who actually do.

Change your oil before you think it needs to be changed.

Quit watching the news for 72 hours and just see how you feel.

Doctors don’t know everything. Neither do preachers. Neither do granddaddies.

Your heart knows a lot more than you give it credit.

Life is too short to work for bosses who treat you like crap.

Make a resolution to rid yourself of all bad habits, you can start with perfectionism.

Never, ever be lazy unless you absolutely feel like it.

Always bury politicians at least six feet below the soil, because deep down they’re good people.

Everyone is screwed up. The only ones who aren’t screwed up live in graveyards.

If you love someone, love them hard. If you hate someone, love them even harder.

There is nothing half as exciting as canceled plans.

If you’re hogging all the credit, you’re going to hog all the blame, too.

This is not the end.

Neither was that.

Ninety-nine percent of the things you worry about will never happen.

If you really want to believe in God, you already do.

Always listen to your grandparents. And if you don’t have any, then you can always listen to mine.

Fresh take on an old Chinese proverb

Dear Abby has gone soft

The "real" Abby would never have said, "Do not try to tell her how to live her life." She would have said, "Kick that roomie out immediately, and tell her to wise up."

Not that kind of girl writes Dear Abby to complain that

"About a year ago, a childhood friend, "Lindsay," came to visit. She loved the town so much she decided to move here and be my roommate.

At first I was excited at the prospect, but my enthusiasm has waned since finding out that Lindsay is very promiscuous. Since January she has had sex with seven men, sometimes dating more than one at a time."

She feared for her reputation, safety and privacy.

So what does Abby suggest? A huge wimp-out. Are women supposed to be assertive and strong in the workplace but not in their own apartments?

"Your letter brings to mind several old sayings. One: People are known by the company they keep. Two: Birds of a feather flock together. Three: People who lie down with dogs usually get up with fleas.

Do not try to tell Lindsay how to live her life. DO remind her that she is now living in a small town where tongues wag. Then explain that although you like her very much, your lifestyles are not compatible and you would like her to move. Your concerns about waking up to find strangers are valid."

Now, that's sure going to get the roommate to wake-up and change her ways. Explaining the obvious is sure to change her sleeping around behavior. And since when does Abby not know that reminding people with little proverbs and cutsy sayings comes across as "telling them how to live."

Thursday Thirteen--13 principles of life

1. A clear conscience should never be confused with a bad memory.

2. Sweeping the room with a glance doesn't qualify as house cleaning.

3. Don't let it all hang out or you might not be able to tuck it back in.

4. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

5. Worry is like a rocking chair--it gives you something to do but gets you nowhere.

6. Whine doesn't improve with age.

7. Experience is what enables you to recognize a mistake when you do it again.

8. I don't know the secret to success, but the key to failure is to try to please everyone.

9. Just when you start to win the rat race, someone develops a bigger, faster rat.

10. Jumping to conclusions, running your mouth, and ducking responsibility don't count as exercise.

11. It is better to light one little candle than to be seen with no makeup under fluorescent lighting.

12. You can't see the big picture if your nose is pressed against it.

13. Talent is like an arm or a leg--use it or lose it.

I've heard them all somewhere, but most recently read them in various selections from God's Little Devotional Journal for Teens, Honor Books, 2001.