Thursday Thirteen

13 things I just don't get (in no particular order). I do like to have certain things make sense. Call it age, but there are common every day sights and experiences that just baffle me. I come up with a blank for an explanation on these thirteen.

1) Declarative sentences that end with a question mark. (The voice rises at the end and the eyebrows go up even though there is no question.) Women do this much more than men. I would almost rather hear the word "like" 15 times in a sentence, than hear it go up at the end.

2) Why I would put on 20 lbs three years after I retired, but not the first two years. It's not the how (too many calories), but the timing.

3) Ugly art. Why bother to create it or buy it? We have friends who spent about $70,000 on their son's fine art education, and I use the term loosely. I would demand my money back.

4) The moral level and premise of popular TV shows like Sopranos (New Jersey psychopaths and their relationships), Desperate Housewives (botoxed and enhanced women as non-productive mooches sleeping with the help), Weeds (Tupperware type woman who makes ends meet by starting her own door-to-door pot dealing business), etc. If those are your favorite shows, what would you be turning off? Football and golf on TV look better to me all the time.

5) Rancorous political pundits in blogs. Left or right--are they just letting off steam or harming the nation? The left far outnumber the right and are even more outrageous and conspiratorial, I just don't link to them. I've already told you I don't read potty mouth bloggers in another "13." Nothing worse than a woman stumbling up to her blog template with a dirty mouth.

6) Fashion trends that glorify sway backs, bellies and muffin tops. I hope the natural waist returns soon to slacks and skirts, someplace other than the L.L.Bean catalog.

7) Poker and gambling glorified on cable TV. We don't have enough addictions in our society? Just invest in stocks. Held long enough, you'll get about 10% over time.

8) Loud, thudding worship music. Do you think God is deaf? Or does your music director own stock in Peavey?

9) Crotch grabbing musicians and poets. Ode to crabs? And inseams that start below the knees. Oh please. Those guys look like men in skirts.

10) Why sex offenders on the Internet or next door is a left-right issue. Why public librarians are such wimps about it.

11) Why we blame restaurants, advertisers and food vendors for Americans being overweight (and Europeans are just a decade behind us). No one is dragging us into the store and force feeding us.

12) Why we can't build roads that will keep up with the traffic, instead of creating life time employment for state workers.

13) Men with earrings. Sissies. The whole bunch. With a pony tail and tattoo they really look dumb and driving a pick-up truck won't change it. Leave the tresses to ladies wearing dresses. Next they'll want their own scrunchies.

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