Just for Today Bookmark found in a book

When I checked online there were several different versions of this “anonymous” card with challenging thoughts.  I must have picked mine up over 30 years ago (it’s orange), and it has been lodged in various books, diaries and drawers since.  So I took another look today. It’s called “working a program.” I’ve italicized (#4, #8) the ones I have no problem with—piece of cake to spend 30 minutes to an hour in the morning usually, with something inspirational (right now it’s Magnificat, but I’ve used other sources). And no problem strengthening my mind—I am not a mental loafer. I read, research and write possibly 5-6 hours a day.   But the rest?  No success, but then I haven’t actually been trying the other 7.  I hate to set goals or make lists, so that’s part of it.  Also I don’t like other people telling me what to do, when, and how—probably why my diets fail after a few weeks.  And this Just for Today bookmark  is something that tells me I’m not doing it the right way to satisfy someone else. 

The biggest challenge for me is #6:

Just for today I will be agreeable.

I will look as well as I can,

dress becomingly,

keep my voice low,

be courteous,

criticize not one bit.

I won't find fault with anything,

nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself.

No problem with “look as well as I can or dress becomingly.”  Always have my make-up on and completely dressed for the day in something attractive before my feet hit the first floor (in shoes, not slippers) in the morning. But the rest?  NO. I doubt I could go 5 minutes. And if you are nodding your head, then you probably have the same problem!  You wish I would change!! Some of us, and we know who we are, just can’t resist finding a better way to do something or improve something—or someone. We seem to gravitate to social media, too.

Just For Today Card

A popular sobriety aid is the Just for Today card that some AA [Al-Anon, Families Anonymous, Overeaters anonymous] members carry in their pocket or purse and refer to when thinking of a drink or they are disturbed by a life event.

Just for today

1. - Just for today I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime.
2. - Just for today I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said, that most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.
3. - Just for today I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my luck as it comes, and fit myself to it.
4. - Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.
5. - Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don't want to do just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.
6. - Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit. I won't find fault with anything, nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself.
7. - Just for today I will have a program. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.
8. - Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective of my life.
9. - Just for today I will be unafraid. Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me.

A proud mother on her daughter's graduation

I met this young woman on Facebook, don’t remember exactly how, but I’ve enjoyed her posts over the years.  I’ve also seen photos of her beautiful daughter, so I was thrilled to see this testimony. There's no better sermon than a life of repentance and change. Ayesha Kreutz,  President of the Frederick Douglass Foundation of New York, writes:

"My oldest has graduated High school and changed her course, deciding to go to college and decided to double major. I suggested it since she got a really good scholarship. I have to say I am super proud of the girl.  See, she grew up with me. When I got pregnant with her it was the first time in my life I was sober, no drugs or alcohol, I quit everything. 

I was a single mother, though I absolutely loved her father, and we tried to make it work, I realized as I got sober he was an addict, more so than I was, his drug use far surpassed mine and after years of trying and going through DT's along with other issues we split for good.

Single, out of wedlock parenthood was terrible. We were homeless and I have been on the food stamp system as well. Through the journey of becoming who I am today, I worked hard to give my daughter a better shot than I had started her out on, by being a single mother. I even found a way to home-school while being a single mom and working full-time.

Eventually, by being obedient and faithful to the Word of Truth and building that relationship with Christ, things did turn around. 

I am married and a stay-at-home homeschooling mom and my oldest is a wonderful young lady. My husband Rocks!

She learned from my mistakes and purposed to listen to my wisdom to do better. She loves the Lord, picks good friends, is compassionate, loves her fellow-man, shares Jesus and through out high-school she danced 15 - 20 hours a week, played sports, even got all-star setter for volleyball and now has gotten a scholarship and going to college.

Many kids raised in adversity find ways to be bitter and angry and make excuses for their failure, but she has found ways to push through the excuses and find ways to make excuses to succeed.

So yep I am a proud mommy. I know college years can be even tougher and we really get a chance to see what they are made of.  So please give her a congratulation and if you are a 100% Bible-believing Christian pray for her and share words of wisdom with her."

Thursday Thirteen plus one

Stop setting goals was the best advice book I’ve  ever read—which I didn’t find until I retired.  “Setting goals” is a creativity and thought killer for about half of us and yet we’re always told to do it or have it or accomplish it.  I was a librarian and we tend to be problem solvers, not goal setters.  The author, Bobb Biehl suggests “targets.”  However, here’s a blog with a similar thought—and I see it’s based the same author, Bobb Biehl, “5 big picture questions and 9 accelerators.” I recognize the 9th accelerator from the "Stop setting goals" book. I made three New Year’s resolutions—measureable, easily accomplished and short time frame (January 31) and met them all.  New ones will be built on that for February. Setting a goal for all of 2014 would have been impossible—at least for me.

1. What three changes will most please God?
2. What can I do to make the most significant impact for God in my lifetime? [I would change this to a specific time—like “in 2014” or the next 5 years]
3  What is the single best measurable indicator that I am making progress toward my dream?
4. What three measureable priorities will I accomplish before I die? [Again, I’d use a specific time frame.  Several years ago I had lunch with a friend whom I hadn’t seen in ages.  We had such a great time we decided to do it again in 2 weeks.  Three days later she died.]
5. What three measurable priorities will I accomplish in the next 10 years? [I would shorten that to one year, or 5 years at the most. No one can know what 10 years will bring. Facebook is 10 years old. Five years ago would you have believed the NSA was collecting your phone information?]

If you’re launching a new project (many TT participants are writers or artists)

1  Name your single greatest strength.

2. Identify three decisions causing the greatest stress.
3. What is overwhelming me?
4. What is my impassable road block?
5. What should I resign from?
6. What can I postpone?
7. What things on my list can others do 80% as well?
8. What elephants are in my schedule?
9. Identify three things in the next 90 days I could do that would make a 50% difference.

I think the important words of this list are the numbers three, changes, indicator, priorities, decisions, schedule, and things. Specific and measureable. The word “impact” is a bit squishy for me, but if it works for you, go for it!

It's amazing what a little rain can do

It's very dry and crispy in northern Ohio, so it is a treat to see all the green around Columbus. Our complex has well water sprinkler system, but the whole metropolitan area has had more rain than the Toledo area. Still we expect some heat build up, so after church I put on some walking shoes, a sleeveless denim dress, and walked for about 15 minutes. It's not as much as I get at the lake where I walk everywhere, but it sooths the conscience.

Some of our neighbors still haven't discovered that now that we have sidewalks, they are expected to take care of the area they can't see from their yard (huge bushes to hide the street). Weeds, grass clippings, and branches from the bushes are making the walk a bit hazardous. 1195 Kingsdale Terrace has a lovely house and yard, but I wish they'd step around the corner and see what we see. 'Taint purty.

Had to go to Caribou this morning since Panera's opens late. I noticed that there's a bulletin board for customers to post their "goals." Some are really funny, but pathetic too, because they are so unrealistic and vague ("change the world"), there's no way to get there from here. I've written before about the best book I ever read on the topic of planning is "Stop setting goals." Worth another look:

The book I'd been waiting for my whole life I didn't read until the first official day of my retirement (Oct. 1, 2000). Its title grabbed me and I knew it was written for me: "STOP SETTING GOALS" by Bob Biehl (Nashville: Moorings, 1995).

The premise is that some people are energized by achieving goals they have set, and others (a higher percentage) are energized by identifying and solving problems. And it isn't semantics. To ask problem solvers to set goals puts knots in their stomachs and interferes with their natural gifts. To ask goal setters to work on a problem puts them in a foul mood because they think "negative" when they hear "problem."

Problem solvers see goal setters as sort of pie-in-the sky, never-finish-anything types, and goal setters see problem solvers as negative nay-sayers. Bigotry, in both directions.

I'm willing to bet that most librarians are problem solvers and that's why they chose the field. I used to be in Slavic Studies. In my own mind, I thought the Soviet Union collapsed from pathologically terminal five year plans--too much goal setting and not enough problem solving.

Biehl poses an interesting question that works for both groups. "What three things can we do in the next 90 days to make a 50% difference (by the end of this year, by the end of the decade, by the end of my life). It makes no difference if you say, "what three goals can we reach" or "what three problems can we solve," because either personality can get a handle on this question.

I was challenged during my last year at work to stop using the word "problem" and replace it with "challenge" or "opportunity." It was a good time to retire. It took away all motivation for showing up at work for a darn good problem solver.

Stop setting goals!!

I was positive I had this book review on my blog somewhere, but with 10 blogs, you do lose track. So here it is again. It is about a book I read right after I retired, that I sure could have used earlier, both in my family life and career. I'm reposting here, because I've got more than a few readers who need to sort through the difference between problem solving and goal setting.

The book I'd been waiting for my whole life I didn't read until the first official day of my retirement (Oct. 1, 2000). Its title grabbed me and I knew it was written for me: "STOP SETTING GOALS" by Bob Biehl (Nashville: Moorings, 1995).

The premise is that some people are energized by achieving goals they have set, and others (a higher percentage) are energized by identifying and solving problems. And it isn't semantics. To ask problem solvers to set goals puts knots in their stomachs and interferes with their natural gifts. To ask goal setters to work on a problem puts them in a foul mood because they think "negative" when they hear "problem."

Problem solvers see goal setters as sort of pie-in-the sky, never-finish-anything types, and goal setters see problem solvers as negative nay-sayers. Bigotry, in both directions.

I'm willing to bet that most librarians are problem solvers and that's why they chose the field. I used to be in Slavic Studies. In my own mind, I thought the Soviet Union collapsed from pathologically terminal five year plans--too much goal setting and not enough problem solving.

Biehl poses an interesting question that works for both groups. "What three things can we do in the next 90 days to make a 50% difference (by the end of this year, by the end of the decade, by the end of my life). It makes no difference if you say, "what three goals can we reach" or "what three problems can we solve," because either personality can get a handle on this question.

I was challenged during my last year at work to stop using the word "problem" and replace it with "challenge" or "opportunity." It was a good time to retire. It took away all motivation for showing up at work for a darn good problem solver.