Thirteen Little Things

When we are children we learn life time lessons from our parents, some by their words, others by actions. Today I'm jotting down 13 habits, techniques, behaviors, attitudes, etc. learned from my parents that are still with me, some without thinking about them, some throw aways, in no particular order. Chime in with a few of yours.

1. If you are with someone, always open the door and let your friend(s) walk through first.

2. Make a square, military corner on the bottom sheet (when I was a little girl there were no fitted sheets) to keep it from pulling loose. Stop to admire your effort. Although I don't do this now, the principle of doing something right the first time and taking pleasure in it is a good one.

3. Always wear an apron in the kitchen. Aprons certainly aren't what they used to be, and it seems to me food splashes more, so when I put one on, I often think of my dad who always reminded me, even as an adult.

4. Turn housework into a game (usually against the clock). My mother was big at trying to make "work" into "fun." This usually got an eye roll from me and a whine.

5. Respect others with your appearance. Both my parents would "fix up" for the other after their work day, and we always ate as a family with properly set table, pleasant conversation.

6. Clean up the kitchen after the meal; never leave dirty dishes on the counter or in the sink. I often fail with this one--maybe this would be a good New Year's resolution.

7. Start the week right with church attendance.

8. A gentleman always comes to the door to pick up a lady for a date. First timers meet the parents.

9. Sit like a lady (this was back in the days when girls and women usually wore skirts or dresses). Corollary: don't slouch.

10. The proper way to answer the phone. We often had to take orders for my dad, so this greeting I no longer use. However, I still keep paper and pencil by the phone, and I try not to mumble. I also overheard how dad spoke to his customers and even today I expect this from business people.

11. "A soft answer turns away wrath." This is my mother's from Proverbs 15:1. Never quite grasped this one, but it worked for my mother, who lived it and often quoted it. I can't remember her ever raising her voice.

12. The person who feeds the puppy is the one who will be loved by it. Usually this was Mom, because despite all our promises to care for it, she's the one who usually took pity on the poor thing. When I was growing up the dogs and cats lived outside. If it got bitterly cold, they could stay on the porch or in the basement.

13. In your lifetime you will probably have three really good friends. I'm still thinking about this one. Life has different stages--friendships vary--but the number seems pretty accurate.

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Christmas Returns

Yesterday I heard on the radio that 40% of the gift receivers return something. Usually, that isn't me. I hardly ever return a gift--primarily I suppose because I'm pretty specific about size and color or type. This year I had no ideas, so a lot is going back! On Friday I asked my daughter if she'd already bought me something, and she said not everything. So I mentioned that my little (ca. 3 lb) roaster was starting to look a bit shabby and chipped. I think I bought it at K-Mart maybe 5 or 6 years ago for $5.00. It's just perfect for a small roast and I use it a lot. She shopped and shopped and shopped, and couldn't find anything. . . except a 5.25 quart ceramic covered cast iron pot in lime green with Rachel Ray's photo on the box. It was so heavy I could barely lift it. Keeping in mind my small kitchen, marble counter tops and glass oven top, I told her I couldn't risk using it (dropping it). She's very organized, so she had the sales receipt taped to the box, and a $20 "same as cash coupon" for the store. So yesterday, expecting the worst, I was off to Kohl's to exchange it. It wasn't at all crowded and the staff was very helpful. I couldn't find anything in cookware, but did exchange it for a new mirror for the bathroom, new cotton flannel sheets in sage green, and I still have over $40 left on the temporary credit card they gave me. And it was 15% off for seniors.

My husband bought me some things that are too small and the wrong color, from a store I never use, so they will go back too. So I'm off to shop. Next year, I'll be more specific to save myself some post-Christmas shopping.

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Checking out the new blogger features

Today I was browsing the blogger.com blog and discovered, or rediscovered, some features. I'm trying out the new template format that doesn't require knowing any html to change your template. I tried it first on the blog with the fewest entries, Growth Industry, since I wasn't sure the changes and revisions would hold. I also learned that because of the objections of people who use blogger.com for their blogs, the comments by non-blogger users has been changed. I think everyone hated it. Works much faster than writing your congress representative!

Me? If people have revised their template to include videos, pod-casts, flickr and ads, my computer locks up, or I can jog around the block while it loads. I am restricted to leaving comments at the more simple designs. But my main blog (this one) is pretty busy too, mainly with links to things I like, such as library databases, on-line newspapers and magazines, and political blogs. Also, it is always a shock to see what my blogs look like on another screen, since on mine I have only a very tiny, discreet border.

Merry Christmas

Photo by Matt Carbone used with permission, mcarbone@aiacolumbus.org
This lovely photo of Matt Carbone's black lab, Mr. Cooper, will remain at the top through December 25. Scroll down for current entries.

'Twas the day before Christmas
and all through our house
all of us were bustling
even my spouse.

Our children are adults now,
happy and busy
with final shopping, all
in a tizzy.

With potatoes and cole slaw,
cranberries, pork roast,
apple bacon stuffing,
dinner we'll host.

Silent Night, Joy to the World
the carols we'll sing
9 p.m. service to
Jesus our king.

I ponder all my blessings,
read each Christmas card,
and thank the good Lord as
I pray so hard

for all my loved ones who will
gather around our tree,
in two thousand and eight
happy will be.

Second day of Winter

It is black as pitch at 7 a.m. in central Indiana this time of winter! We left our hosts still snuggled in bed (they leave for Florida tomorrow) and made our way down a windy 38 on to Mt. Comfort Road and the Rt. 70 exit.

"Oh, look at the lovely RVs," I sighed, as the bright lot lights lit the whole exit with the fancy paint designs of a huge RV sales lot. "Maybe we should spend $80-$100,000 and just take off across the country visiting little RV parks."

"If you're ever a widow, ask your next husband," he said, and a strong tail wind pushed our little mini-van home by 10.

A sober diet

Although I said I wouldn't browse when I returned my books to the library, I lied. Poor Richard's Almanack [Ben Franklin], December 1742, had this to say about eating a sober diet:

"A sober Diet makes a Man die without Pain;

it maintains the Senses in Vigour;

it mitigates the Violence of the Passions and Affections.

It preserves the Memory,

it helps the Understanding,

it allays the Heat of Lust;

it brings a Man to a Consideration of his latter End;

it makes the Body a fit Tabernacle for the Lord to dwell in;

which makes us happy in the World,

and eternally happy in the World to come,

through Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour."

Today's 10 Tasks

1) Return 3 volumes to the OSU library on Ackerman Rd. DO NOT STOP TO BROWSE!!!

2) Pick up the dry cleaning.

3) Make dessert to take to Indiana.

4) Walk at least a mile. It's NOT cold.

5) Read my health care plan.

6) Open up the box with the new computer and read the instructions.

7) Clean my desk top.

8) Let everyone know the Monday-Tuesday schedule and check supplies for dinner.

9) Type VAM minutes.

10)Go out for dinner with friends and swap Ireland stories (they've been there many times).

Huckabee's Merry Christmas

The hysteria about Huckabee's "Merry Christmas" ad is amusing--is it political (yes), is it about Jesus (yes), are there cross shapes in bookshelves, venetian blinds, floor tiles, building plans and airplane wing spans (yes), does the birth of Jesus Christ come before his death on the cross (yes), are there pagan, non-Christian elements in the ad, such as a yule tree (yes), do other religions have celebrations that involve light (yes), is Huckabee wearing a red sweater which could possibly symbolize his party, his faith, or the Christmas season (yes), is he a former Baptist minister (yes), is he a candidate for President of the United States (yes), is the U.S. a nation where the majority of the citizens report being Christians (yes), are the media looking for reasons to bring him down (yes), do the media and the entertainment industry regularly look for ways to demean Christians and their faith (yes), is this controversy a way to sneak the word "Christmas" back into the winter holiday (yes)?

Thursday Thirteen--13 Employment Strategies

Although I'm retired, there was a time in my life 25 years ago when I worked in the employment field. Yes, I was unemployed, couldn't find a job in my own field (libraries), so I went to work for the state government of Ohio, using federal funds (JTPA), helping other laid off or unemployed people find jobs. A sweet deal for me, although my colleagues and I in the program may be the only unemployed people who actually benefited. I loved my co-workers and the tasks--I did research, wrote publications, put on workshops, travelled, wrote speeches for bureaucrats, learned a lot about government, and was on a steep learning curve, something that has always been the joy of working in libraries. Your tax dollars and mine hard at work.

So when I saw this in today's Wall St. Journal in Sue Shellenbarger's column, I just couldn't resist. A recent graduate with an MA in Art History can't find a job in the Memphis art community. I immediately attacked the problem with my own on-the-job training of 25 years ago, plus my 23 years in the library field, and 18 years of hands-on parenting skills dumping loads of unheeded advice on my own 2 children.

1. Although it's too late now, don't pursue a degree in art history. And you certainly shouldn't have gone on for a master's. Do your parents have a money tree in the back yard? This degree is for rich kids who just want to say they went to college or average income, scholarship students who get bumped from their first choice when it's time to declare a major. This field employs no one except the faculty who teach it.

2. Move away from Memphis. If there ARE any jobs in art history, you have to go where the jobs are. They don't come to you. This also applies to librarians, lawyers and linguists. Just don't come to Columbus. We have a terrific art college here (CCAD), plus OSU, Franklin, Otterbein, Capital, and Columbus State, and their graduates are looking for work, too.

3. Whatever computer classes or skills you have now, get more. If you're lucky, the left and right sides of your brain are on speaking terms. If they're not, get used to hating this aspect of your career because it isn't going away. Deal with it. No one said life is fair.

4. Spend 40 hours a week looking for a job. That was the primary take-away I learned from my own JTPA contract in the employment field. Your job today is getting a job. If you can't bear the thought of one more interview or sending out one more resume, you're sunk. (Keep in mind, however, that most people get jobs through people they know who know people. So make part of that 40 hours telling everyone you know that you're looking.)

5. Research each place you apply to, and that includes the "culture," especially (if you're female) what they wear to work. Sounds trivial, but if you show up looking like a bank executive and the boss is in a t-shirt and ball cap, you won't put on your best performance, even though he probably won't notice your outfit. Green or purple hair and tongue studs almost never work on an interview. Drool is so tacky. Wouldn't hurt to know what they do to please their board of directors and donors, either.

The next suggestions are from the WSJ column, but I have to tell you, if these worked, no one would be getting the tougher degrees, they'd all have art history degrees. Shellenbarger suggests expanding the job search into these fields--

6. marketing and advertising
7. design
8. photography
9. web-site architecture

(these are all art related, but look what CCAD expects of high school graduates to have in their portfolio)

10. publishing
11. teaching
12. writing

and then

13. hiring a job coach to work on your interviewing skills.

Pork Cracklings

Whether you call them scrunchions, scratchings or cracklings, they are fried, salty, fatty bits of pig skin. And Congress loves its pork.

"President Bush signed into law historic energy legislation Wednesday that will shape U.S. energy policy for decades to come. The law seeks to dramatically reduce U.S. energy consumption over the next 25 years by applying the AIA's 2030 carbon-reducing targets to federal buildings, increasing fuel efficiency standards for automobiles, and establishing new energy efficiency standards for appliances." AIA Angle Dec. 19, 2007

Not much new here. Move along.

Emergent or emerging, we were doing this EC stuff 35 years ago at another church--before we were believers. We sat in the dark, stared at candles, listened to strange music with no theology, and talked churchy-talk and psycho-babble. Nothing or little about Jesus. Just churchiness. Community. Feel-good service. Relevancy to the culture. I'm really surprised that young Christians (although their Pied Pipers aren't all that young--aging boomers) are falling for this. PBS seems to get it better than some evangelical pastors. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzZ14Sk9u9Y

Oldie but goodie

This has been around the net many times, but it popped up in my e-mail this morning, sent by a friend of my husband from his high school years. I got a chuckle, maybe you will too.

A woman in a hot air balloon realizes she is lost. She lowers her altitude and spots a man fishing from a boat below.

She shouts to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The man consults his portable GPS and replies, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degree s, 49.09 minutes west longitude.

She rolls her eyes and says, "You must be a Republican!"

"I am," replies the man. "How did you know?"

"Well," answers the balloonist, "everything you tell me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you're not much help to me."

The man smiles and responds, "You must be a Democrat."

"I am," replies the balloonist. "How did you know?"

"Well," says the man, "You don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and now you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but, somehow, now it's my fault."

Can WSJ writers find a real victim?

I've complained here many times about the "news" stories in the Wall St. Journal, WaPo, and NYT. Most of the "social concern" stories belong on the editorial page, except that's what intelligent, well educated people read. But the one on Dec. 6 in the WSJ titled "House of cards; how the subprime mess hit poor immigrant groups" written by Jonathan Karp and Miriam Jordan really takes the cake for biased, bad reporting. What school graduated these incompetents? We really do have a subprime mess--but using one woman, Naira Costa, to make a blanket statement about immigrants, and she an illegal immigrant who used someone else's credit card to inflate her credit score, gets a home loan for $713,000 (on a cleaning job salary of $2,000/mo), never made a payment, and she's suing the broker? Oh PULEEZE! Just for good measure, they throw in her Pentecostal church as one of the bad guys, and in today's WSJ reader section, the pastor says she wasn't a member and besides he has no control over what members do. Karp and Jordan must have really been trolling the dregs to find this story.

I'm a Mandarin!

You're an intellectual, and you've worked hard to get where you are now. You're a strong believer in education, and you think many of the world's problems could be solved if people were more informed and more rational. You have no tolerance for sloppy or lazy thinking. It frustrates you when people who are ignorant or dishonest rise to positions of power. You believe that people can make a difference in the world, and you're determined to try.

Talent: 49%
Lifer: 38%
Mandarin: 54%

Take the Talent, Lifer, or Mandarin quiz.

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Bad dreams

We rarely see Law and Order in a current season, so we didn't see the 2005-2006 season finale until last night. It was really awful. I left the room and went to bed it was so brutal and vicious. Checking the show blogs and story lines this morning, I see that in April, 2006, Annie Parisse, who was playing Assistant District Attorney Alexandra Borgia, gave her notice because it looked like the show wasn't going to be renewed--or possibly, she was just tired after 34 episodes of the dumb lines and ugly clothes they always write for the ADA who does all the grunt work for McCoy, no matter who plays the part--Jill Hennessey, Angie Harmon, Carey Lowell or Elizabeth Rohm. Like a lot of series where women play the second banana, they are expected to look good if they peel. I never thought Elizabeth Rohm (the ADA before Parisse) was a very good actress, but she was stunning. I'm sure it was a surprise to her in her final episode to discover she was a lesbian--sure was to me. Smack her around a bit, Mr. Wolf; make sure the audience will always remember that just in case anyone casts her in a romantic lead. Sam Waterston and Jerry Orbach aren't pretty guys, how come they don't have beauty standards for men?

Annie Parisse (whose brother married Sam Waterston's daughter, according to Wikipedia) is not just brutally and graphically murdered in the final 2006 episode, but is found in a dumpster, not unlike the usual opening scene, mouth duct taped, having aspirated her own vomit and with her face bashed in. I hope they used a mannequin, because if it had been me, I would have refused that scene. Man, they were really mad at her!

I think it is time for Law and Order, all versions, to close up shop. Women, conservatives, anyone religious but especially Christians, and all honest and ethical law enforcement personnel should change channels; those are the folks either ridiculed, besmirched or written off as evil. No more reruns for me.

Everybody knows

that diets aren't the answer; that it's a lifestyle. Or do they? I was reading through the comments at a blog the other day. Both the blog writer and reader were commenting on their own obesity. The reader said she had successfully lost 60 pounds, kept it off for six years, been a counselor in a commercial weight loss program, and then gradually all the weight returned as she realized that without spending all her day thinking about what she would eat, there was no way she could maintain her weight.

And the thought occurred to me that most people of "normal" weight probably do just that--think about what to eat, when to eat, and how much to eat, and how the calories will be expended if overeating does occur. I do. So do others who are not overweight. I just finished breakfast (fruit and walnuts); I'm already thinking about lunch (4 or 5 vegetables). In fact, my husband is the only person I know who seems to have built-in signals that keep him from over eating, but if he does decide he's "packed on" 5 lbs., he stops eating crackers and peanut butter in the evening, and in a few weeks, he's back to normal (ca. 155 lbs.)

My great-grandmother Nancy (1833-1892) had nine children, as did her mother-in-law Elizabeth (1791-1878), who lived with her after her husband's death. You don't think these ladies spent most of their day figuring out how to bake enough bread or slaughter and stew enough chickens to feed a bunch like that? This is nothing new for women--what's new is abundance instead of scarcity, choices instead of physical labor, and we haven't learned the new game plan.

We went out to eat Friday night with friends we've known (but not well) for about 30 years. She's thin and toned. She's probably in her early 70s, but has looked this way to me since her 40s. For dinner she ordered a turkey wrap and a salad. She took half the wrap order home. The next day she was going to be biking 20 miles to have breakfast with friends. The temperatures here were about 30 degrees, and it was windy. She's also a swimmer. We then went to their home where she served a wonderful warm pumpkin tart made with Splenda topped with sugar-free Cool-Whip. You don't think she plans, computes and calculates everything that goes in her mouth and how many calories are burned in biking and swimming?

Oddies, Endies, and Undies

Yesterday I noted that my husband squeaked through on registration to tour the new Dublin Methodist Hospital to get 3 credit hours in health, safety and welfare for his continuing education requirements. At supper last night (homemade pizza) he couldn't stop raving about the design, creativity and planned well-being for patients. So it is definitely a winner, all around. You folks who live in Dublin and surrounding areas are going to have one super community hospital.


As I was settling in for a nap (one of my favorite events of the day) about 2 p.m. I heard a loud crash. I was a bit groggy, but realized the roof was not above me--the master bedroom is there. So I walked upstairs carefully, thinking perhaps a mirror or painting had fallen. When I got to the master bath, I saw that all the marble trim tile had fallen off the edge of the vanity. If anyone had been standing there in bare feet, he would have had a broken toe. I walked downstairs and told my husband (he uses that bathroom), and he said he wasn't surprised, that it was noted in the inspection in 2001 when we bought the condo, but hadn't been fixed.

So I settled in again for my nap. The phone rang and my husband picked it up from the kitchen. I opened an eye and looked at the TV screen. A name and phone number appeared. The conversation was with the buyer of one of the condos that has been for sale for a year. My husband is president of the association, and this purchase has involved many meetings of the board. When he hung up he said the purchase was final. I asked the buyer's name, but he couldn't remember. Was it--and I mentioned the name that had appeared on our TV screen, and he said Yes. Now that's weird. We assume it is something in her phone, because to our knowledge, this has never happened before. Has this ever happened to you?

A nap was definitely out of the question after two interruptions, so I decided to go Christmas shopping. I had four cards from Macy's. Two for $15 off a $50 purchase, and two for $25 off a $100 purchase. The problem was Macy's was also having a one day sale--something like "take another 20% off the already 50% markdown." I'm math challenged. So when I got my carefully totalled gifts (in my head) to the head of the check out line (waited 10 minutes), they only came to $82. So I'm refiguring what we'd agreed on, and go back and pick up an item that was $18 (although the $9 would have done just as well). See, that's how they trap you. In my head, I'm deducting the $25 off my son's gift, so it evens out with my daughter's and son-in-law's, but the receipt shaves each item--and actually totals $26 and not $25. I'll stick with my head on this.

I still have two cards left, so I browse the ladies lingerie department--not for a gift, but for me. My favorite brand of undies (which always seems to be on sale) has a buy 3 get one free (ca. $18), although because of the sale, I have no idea what it will be when I get to the register. So I go down stairs and look at shoes to see if there's something in 8.5 AA, and I select 2 Naturalizers and take them to the desk (no one comes to you these days). You would have thought I'd asked for the moon. "We have no narrow sizes in any style," she sniffed (She was quite large, and I think that's why narrow sizes are disappearing). You see, I thought if I bought a pair of shoes I didn't really need, I'd get the panties I didn't really need almost for "free." Saved from consumer hell by a shoe width.

Pholph's Scrabble Generator My Scrabble© Score is: 37. What is your score? Get it here.

That was close!

As an architect, my husband needs a certain number of continuing education credits each year to keep his license, and he has plenty, but was .5 short in one category--health, safety and welfare. One of the problems with finding anything out is that he doesn't use a computer, and all his newsletters have gone to e-format. So I'm the one who glances through them, and mentions things to him. (Like the architect his age who died when he fell off the ladder cleaning gutters.) But because he didn't know until 2 days ago about the 1/2 missing credit, I haven't really been paying attention. So yesterday I scanned the last few issues to see if we missed something, and at 4 p.m. an e-mail popped up about "only 4 spaces left." I thought maybe it was spam because I didn't recognize the sender's address, but I clicked on it. There it was: 3 credits for something today at 3 p.m., near-by, and inexpensive! I hollered downstairs, "I found something, but it's tomorrow!" I printed it off, he called, and the office was closed. So this morning about 9:15 he called--got an answering machine. She calls back in 5 minutes, and said she'd just had a cancellation (it was full). So he's in, and should have a good time previewing a new hospital in Dublin, Ohio.