#33 Time in a bottle

After I deleted 35 spam from my e-mail box offering me sex products, new mortgages, on-line prescription plans, ink cartridges, and Caribbean cruises, I found a message from my secondary pension plan which said, “Wouldn’t you rather get your documents by e-mail?” Below the lovely photo of a letter inside a bottle buried in the sand were the words “Save paper, money and time.”

Actually, no. These days, important documents should probably be sent the old fashioned way--through the U.S. postal system, hand carried by my dependable mail lady, dropped through my front door mail slot, opened carefully and thoughtfully with a letter opener, and laid on the coffee table to be perused during TV commercial breaks.