Friday, October 24, 2003

#49 That Depends
Peace of mind, control guard, extra barriers, tape, wrap ups, briefs, tabs, panels, color coded, containment zones, reduces leaks, and finally, superior protection strategically placed. Does Attorney General John Ashcroft know about this?

In Ohio, I think the Bureau of Motor Vehicles is allowed to sell mailing addresses along with personal information, such as birth date. How else did a “home care product” company get our address? If it wasn’t purchased from BMV, then it was from some other firm that knows we have a Golden Buckeye Card (probably a computer harvests the names and addresses and resells them when used at a store).

This brochure offered a whole thesaurus of products including Depend, Prevail, Attend, Wings, Poise, Presence, Serenity, Surety, Tranquility, ATN (all through the night), Per-Fit, Nu-Fit, and in case something slipped through the containment zone, it discreetly suggests Dignity, an odor eliminator spray.

This company specializes in discreet home delivery of incontinent supplies, “right to your door.” I had no idea that there was such a huge variety of products, in a wide assortment of sizes and styles. In fact, I’d never heard of these products until June Allyson, who danced through the movies of our teen-age years and huskily played the wives of those famous men, was hawking them on TV. If she really did have an incontinent mother, I’m sure Mom was thrilled to have it announced on national television. Maybe she was a stage mother and it was pay back time.

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