The Chinese tooth fairy has struck

I hate loyalty schemes--don't use coupons, sweepstakes, mileage points, or a plastic loyalty card if I can help it. Staples has the only loyalty card worth bothering with--you actually can get their products or $$ off your next purchase at the copy shop. But somehow, my husband has a rewards scheme attached to his gasoline purchases. One day I found a small box under a bush in the yard--apparently it was intended for the mail box, but didn't quite get there. I forget what was in it--something really tacky in bright paper. Then a few more things started arriving like a lighted magnifying glass that doesn't even work as well as my 2003 eye glasses and a bulky 100% PVC credit card holder and wallet with a handy dandy calculator inside. All made in China. All trinkets useful only for today's consumer who thinks that we need to be rewarded for shopping. But today's prize. Well, it's really special. A genuine Orbiter Hands Free Can Opener.



Cooking hint: I was preparing a roast for supper, and ladies, pour cream of mushroom soup over a roast and it will be wonderfully tender with lots of gravy and no lumps, 2 hours at 325. So I decided to open the can with my new Orbiter. I put that baby down on the can and pressed the button. Nothing. Pressed it again. Nothing. Then again and WOW it just took off. I removed my hand (was afraid it'd get eaten) and it worked all by itself. In fact, it wouldn't quit. Around and around. I could see parts of the can we're being cut off. I picked it up and pulled it off the can, but that little sucker just kept on working, around and around, mushroom soup going everywhere. I grabbed it and punched the button on the underside, but it kept going. So I just put it down and watched it struggle, gasping, until it finally stopped.

The instructions with Orbiter say to prevent food borne illnesses I need to clean the blade after each use, and never with a solvent or detergent. But I should remove the batteries first. Then following the enclosed diagram I can remove the blade and clean it with a slightly damp cloth, dry it and replace the blade door. Now, I shouldn't leave it in sunlight, or in a hot humid place, nor should I immerse it in water or other liquids. When I'm done using it, I should remove the batteries, if it will be awhile. But I'm to keep the batteries away from children because they might swallow them. The instructions are also in Spanish and French.

I've been using the same hand-held can opener for about 30 years. Seems to work OK and occasionally I clean it when it gets really gunky. I don't think it is in any danger from this sleek, younger model.