Shower rules

My husband and I have discussed this many times--rules for taking a shower. Not how to get clean, mind you, but how to keep the cottage bathroom from becoming a playground for mold. A disaster of peeling paint and drooping wallpaper. Sticky floors and standing water. If you click on this photo, you'll see what we'll have to repair this summer--two years after we repaired it.

So, after 21 years of thinking people would follow our cheery suggestions (our adult children, our guests, our relatives and strangers), I 'm going to write and post some rules. I haven't firmed these up, but for starters:

Please limit your shower to 3 minutes or less.

Check the water temperature before pushing the plunger that releases the water from the shower head. The plumber installed everything backwards; you are forewarned.

Remove the shower head from the wall and hold it over the tub before pulling the plunger. It is designed to be hand-held, not wall-squirted.

If the main spigot squeals and whines, adjust the plunger just a smidgen. DO NOT SMACK IT. It's easily as old as you are, and maybe more.

Turn your face to the window, and your rear to the curtain. You won't die if a clammy plastic curtain pats your bottom.

Get your face and body wet. If the shower head can't be placed on your shoulder while you generate some suds, turn off the water with the plunger. I just lay it on my right shoulder, and it has never fallen.

Rinse.

Turn off the water.

Step only on the bath mat.

Dry.

Do not hang a wet towel on the door--it has a varnish finish and will turn white.

Take the small utility towel from the slanted grab bar and wipe down the small amount of water that has splashed from your body to the walls, miniblind, and window sill. NEVER leave water on the window sill. Blot, do not rub, the water on the wallpaper border.

If you dry and spray your hair in the bathroom, please use a wet paper towel and wipe up the linoleum when finished--or the next person to use it will stick to the floor.

I may never post this in a frame in the bathroom, but I sure feel better. Most people 50 and under have never known a life when showers weren't enclosed and tiled. Coming to the lake and using a 65 year old bathroom which was remodeled in 1985 has challenges.