2261 Is there life after forty?

Today's 40-somethings are sometimes having their first babies, so I don't think this is as much a worry as 60 years ago when Robert M. Yoder wrote, "Is there a life after forty," for the Saturday Evening Post (Nov. 15, 1947). However, I have come across some Thursday Thirteeners in their late 30s who mention turning 40 with some dread in their "about me" section of their blogs. My kids occasionally mention it because one will turn 40 in 2007 and the other in 2008--not too far away from 2006. So here's some words from Yoder about turning 40.

Forty is the real Awkward Age; you are old enough to realize that you would look silly doing things you are still young enough to wish you could do.

Forty is when young girls. . .start calling you "mister" . . .

At forty you clearly aren't twice as smart as you were at twenty, and it is certainly more like two thirds of being sixty than it is like being four times ten.

Forty is half of being eighty, which would suggest that forty is the adolescence of old age.

At twenty you would climb a sixty-foot tree to get a leaf some girl said was pretty. At forty you'd . . .buy her a single ticket to the nearest arboretum.

At twenty, if a friend got thrown into jail for espousing some cause, you would organize mass meetings and demand to be thrown into jail with him. At forty you would telephone the precinct captain or the judge's sweetie and get action faster.

At twenty, if a girl gives you a long, direct look and smiles, you look into the next mirror to see why you are so attractive. At forty you look to see who's behind you or what's unbuttoned.

At thirty, you notice you are putting on a little weight. . .so you play handball two nights a week, cut down desserts and alcohol, and sweat off four pounds. At forty you take another drink, order pie a la mode and make a note to get pleated trousers.

At twenty, if nine p.m. finds you at home, you are sore. At forty, if the phone rings after seven, you wish whoever is coming would pick a night you didn't want to [listen to the radio--obviously a reference to the 1940s].

At twenty you welcome a chance to dive off a bridge, rescue a drowning man and be a page one hero. At forty, if you did not get drowned trying, you would clip the man twice--once to rescue him and once for ruining your good suit.

At twenty you will drive ninety miles an hour for 200 miles through a snowstorm to see one particular girl. At forty you would phone any girl who's home, invite her to come over by cab, and resent it if you miss the 11 p.m. news broadcast.

At twenty you'd work nights for a week to avoid missing a party. At forty you wouldn't stay out after midnight for anything up to and including one of the orgies of Imperial Rome, and even there you would have heard the stories.

At forty you realize you are not coasting, but just skidding.

I remember thinking my 40s were pretty great, but then my kids turned 16 and made the rest of that decade miserable. My 50s were really good and I did lots of wonderful career related things, but the 60s and retirement are terrific.

So, friends, don't sweat turning 40. Or 50. Or 60.

2260 Mortality after the hospitalization of a spouse

The recent death of Dana Reeve, wife of Christopher Reeve, who with her husband established a foundation to battle spinal cord injuries, has reminded us again the terrible toll on the health of the care taker.

The February 16, 2006 issue of the New England Journal of Medicine published a study, "Mortality after the hospitalization of a spouse," in which it was shown that the negative effect on the caregiver spouse varies by the type of illness, length of time, and the gender. Mortality for a husband who has a wife who is hospitalized is higher in almost all cases than for wives whose husbands are hospitalized, but particularly for hip fracture and dementia.

Just the hospitalization (not the death) of a spouse puts the caregiver at risk for death almost as high as if the spouse had died--particularly within the first 30 days. But this would indicate the stress level of those with spouses who have serious illnesses. When I read the article I photocopied it for our UALC minister who works with our older members. My own theory on why this risk would be particularly high during the first 30 days is that it takes a while for the social and support network to kick in--for adult children to arrive to help, for friends to start doing what friends do, for church members to send cards, visit, and offer transportation and for the care giver to adjust to a new routine. Therefore, I think this article needs to be in the hands of every church that has a large percentage of older memers. Many public libraries carry NEJM--go take a look today.

From the abstract: "Results: Overall [of the 518,240 couples in the study], 383,480 husbands (74 percent) and 347,269 wives (67 percent) were hospitalized at least once, and 252,557 husbands (49 percent) and 156,004 wives (30 percent) died. Mortality after the hospitalization of a spouse varied according to the spouse's diagnosis. Among men, 6.4 percent died within a year after a spouse's hospitalization for colon cancer, 6.9 percent after a spouse's hospitalization for stroke, 7.5 percent after a spouse's hospitalization for psychiatric disease, and 8.6 percent after a spouse's hospitalization for dementia. Among women, 3.0 percent died within a year after a spouse's hospitalization for colon cancer, 3.7 percent after a spouse's hospitalization for stroke, 5.7 percent after a spouse's hospitalization for psychiatric disease, and 5.0 percent after a spouse's hospitalization for dementia. After adjustment for measured covariates, the risk of death for men was not significantly higher after a spouse's hospitalization for colon cancer (hazard ratio, 1.02; 95 percent confidence interval, 0.95 to 1.09) but was higher after hospitalization for stroke (hazard ratio, 1.06; 95 percent confidence interval, 1.03 to 1.09), congestive heart failure (hazard ratio, 1.12; 95 percent confidence interval, 1.07 to 1.16), hip fracture (hazard ratio, 1.15; 95 percent confidence interval, 1.11 to 1.18), psychiatric disease (hazard ratio, 1.19; 95 percent confidence interval, 1.12 to 1.26), or dementia (hazard ratio, 1.22; 95 percent confidence interval, 1.12 to 1.32). For women, the various risks of death after a spouse's hospitalization were similar. Overall, for men, the risk of death associated with a spouse's hospitalization was 22 percent of that associated with a spouse's death (95 percent confidence interval, 17 to 27 percent); for women, the risk was 16 percent of that associated with death (95 percent confidence interval, 8 to 24 percent).

Conclusions Among elderly people hospitalization of a spouse is associated with an increased risk of death, and the effect of the illness of a spouse varies among diagnoses. Such interpersonal health effects have clinical and policy implications for the care of patients and their families."

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen things I like about singing in the choir.

When I planned my retirement in 2000, my list of activities was long and detailed--art, writing, travel, volunteering, study--it was even posted on my website (since taken down). Choir wasn’t on the list--for good reason. I didn’t sing much. Actually, it was closer to "never" than to "much." Not only was I not singing, I was losing my ability to read music. Our church uses screens rather than hymnals, and I'd given my piano to my daughter. When I was employed as a librarian, I taught classes, attended meetings, discussed reference and bibliographic problems with library users, supervised my staff and went to lunch with colleagues. By 6 p.m., I only wanted to collapse--not talk or sing. After retirement, I didn’t talk much at all--sometimes not for hours or all day and soon I was also losing my speaking voice. So last fall I decided I would join the church choir that had started a new schedule in a location that was convenient for me. Then I got bronchitis, so I didn’t start until February 2006. Here’s 13 things I like about singing in the choir.

1. I loved liked singing when I was young.

2. I have many memories of “junior choir” in church as a young child and the “Treble Clef” choir in high school, so it is a bit of a stroll down memory lane to be singing again.

3. I grew up in a home with music and I miss that. I even sang in a little quartet with my siblings. Only one of us had the talent and determination to become a musician and it wasn't me, but I did take piano lessons and play trombone as well as participate in choirs.

4. I think my weak vocal chords might benefit from some exercise, just like my other body parts.

5. Music may also be good for the brain cells and learning to breathe correctly can‘t hurt either.

6. The choir members are a fun loving, delightful group. They know how to laugh, but they can really get down to business. Some are professionals.

7. The director, Mike Martin, is fabulous. I’m learning a lot (that’s good for you too). He’s the director of music at a local high school and a wonderful pianist.

8. Worship with the choir feels more intimate and focused than when sitting in a pew. We have prayers about our task and each other‘s concerns, discussion of the meaning of the words, and devotions after rehearsal. Because we sit in a loft behind the congregation we are free to join our families in the sanctuary when we are finished with the anthem.

9. In worship, God is the audience and we are the performers--all of us. The hymns sound better to my ear when I’m surrounded by terrific sopranos and tenors. We sing at the two traditional services (we have eleven) and those have the beautiful hymns with the good words.

10. I love sitting within a few feet of the piano and pipe organ and watching the musicians. There's a lot going on behind the scenes that I didn't know about and I'm impressed.

11. When I hang out with talented people like the choir members, I hope some of it might rub off on me and I‘ll get better. If you want to play better tennis or golf or chess, always play with those who are better than you.

12. Thankfully, no one has asked me to audition, but I'm pretty sure I’ll never be a soprano again. I’ve moved to the alto section, and they are nice too.

13. Scripture says to “Make a joyful noise,” so I’m really confident I can at least do that. Joyfully.

Visitors and other Thirteeners: 1. Anvilcloud from Canada, 2. Carol, a reading specialist 3. Tanya, from North Queensland 4. Dariana, a new grandmother and more on the way, 5. Elle, a UK knitter, 6. Denise, who has free templates, 7. Wystful1 who is a retiree and a grandmother, 8. TNChick, who is from the great state of Tennessee, 9. Melli who is limber and losing, 10. Jade, Arizona domestic diva, 11. Veronika from nearby Indiana, 12. Dawn, a country girl, 13. Carmen looking for an agent, 14. Jane the reader, 15. Mar blogging from Spain, 16. FrogLegs with a very interesting medical history, 17. Stacey's in the supermarket, 18. Nicole on a roller coaster, 19. Eph2810, living in AZ, missing Germany 20. Lingerie Lady who votes early and often, 21. d. Roe, not feeling love today, 22. Chickadee, hoping for a new job 23. Kimmy, with all the facts, 24. Courtney with a huge pile of books, 25. Mamma M trying Flylady, 26. Lindsey taking quizes, 27. TutuBent reviewing her life, 28. Lily Bleu who loves movies, 29. Katherine, who loves her hubby, 30. Kdubs taking photos, 31. Lazy Daisy who's a friend to many, 32. Mama Kelly, 33. JK who's had a touch of flu, 34. Mama Bee, not even 30, 35. Angel, a real hockey fan, 36. Ardice with linkage, 37. Scouser, thinking more topics,


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2258 Peggy and Ben pick on George

No, not our president, but a man who looks like he's thinking of following in another handsome movie star's footsteps. George Clooney. Peggy Noonan comments on his Oscar speech (which I missed along with most of the United States).

"Orson Welles had a canny respect for the audience while maintaining a difficult relationship with studio executives, whom he approached as if they were his intellectual and artistic inferiors. George Clooney has a canny respect for the Hollywood establishment, for its executives and agents, and treats his audience as if it were composed of his intellectual and artistic inferiors. (He is not alone in this. He is only this year's example.)

And because they are his inferiors, he must teach them. He must teach them about racial tolerance and speaking truth to power, etc. He must teach them to be brave. And so in his acceptance speech for best supporting actor the other night he instructed the audience about Hollywood's courage in making movies about AIDS, and recognizing the work of Hattie McDaniel with an Oscar. . . He doesn't even know he's not heroic. He thinks making a movie in 2005 that said McCarthyism was bad is heroic.

In an odd way [the Clooney generation] haven't experienced life; they've experienced media. Their films seem more an elaboration and meditation on media than an elaboration and meditation on life. This is how he could take such an unnuanced, unsophisticated, unknowing gloss on the 1950s and the McCarthy era. He just absorbed media about it. And that media itself came from certain assumptions and understandings, and myths." Peggy Noonan

Peggy is more nuanced and kind than Ben Steyn: " “I’m an old-time liberal and I don’t apologize for it,” Clooney told Newsweek. Good for him. And certainly, regardless of how liberal he is, he’s “old-time”. I don’t mean in the sense that he has the gloss of an old-time movie star, the nearest our age comes to the sheen of Cary Grant in a Stanley Donen picture, but that his politics is blessedly undisturbed by any developments on the global scene since circa 1974. . . In Good Night And Good Luck, he’s produced a film set in the McCarthy era that could have been made in the Jimmy Carter era. That’s to say, it takes into account absolutely nothing that has come to light in the last quarter-century – not least the relevant KGB files on Soviet penetration of America." Steyn on Screen

2257 The Armenian Genocide

Two weeks ago, PBS announced "that its upcoming documentary, "The Armenian Genocide," will be followed on some stations by a panel discussion featuring two so-called scholars who claim that the genocide is a myth. Worse, according to genocide historian Peter Balakian, PBS threatened to pull the documentary if he and another genocide scholar declined to participate "on the other side" in the panel discussion, which was taped in January. Although the documentary is not slated to run until April, programmers across the country are now deciding whether to air it at all, air it alone or air it with the taped debate."

Story in LATimes, an OpEd piece written by Aris Janigian (registration). Frankly, I didn't know any serious, intelligent person doubted the murder, rape, torture and starvation of millions of Armenians. Where do they think all these Armenian-Americans came from? If our political ties with the Turks are the reason, I'm just not impressed. Bad, bad PBS!

Janigian continues: "Why has PBS resorted to double-speak in regard to the Armenian genocide? The answer is simple: PBS is capitulating to politics. For years the Turks, America's so-called allies, have issued threats against any organization or country that challenges their quack reading of history. When the French recognized the Armenian genocide, the Turks recalled their ambassador to France, boycotted French products and canceled military contracts. They have threatened to withdraw strategic support from our country if we should dare make the same mistake."

Washington Post article

Armenian genocide

2256 Letters to the Editor

I write a lot of them. Then I get an e-mail back asking if my letter can be posted/published, and I always say NO. I have my opinion, but it is for their eyes only. Most recently I got responses from Wired, and a medical journal (can't remember which one). If your letter (of constructive, witty criticism) is published you get a stuffy response from the author of the article, or a snarky one from another reader who didn't even read past the first "however."

However, Architectural Digest publishes the most fabulous "letters to the editor"--they always make me want to go back and pick up that issue, because I never, never have a memory of the article or the issue being THAT terrific.

For example, the April letters about the January issue:

"The January 2006 was the best I've ever read. . ."
"It's work like that which makes your magazine the benchmark. . ."
"When I'm asked what I want for Christmas my reply is subscription to AD. . ."
"Never before have I read an issue cover to cover. . ."
"I have to tell you how much I enjoyed the January issue. . ."

From the March issue (I never, never give away my Hollywood issue, so don't ask), more on the January issue:

"By comparing the advice of the experts and incorporating their lists of dos and don'ts with my own tastes, I have embarked on an adverture. . ."
"Your January issue was remarkable. . ."
I loved the advice. . .on how to make small rooms appear bigger. . ."
"taken his consistently excellent work to new heights. . ."

Guess I'll have to go find the January issue. I don't remember it at all.

Architectural Digest
letters

2255 A quick blogger tip

Have you ever had a problem getting blogger software to load your photos into your blog text? I often don't decide on a photo until I've written something and think it needs a little splash of color. So I look through my photos, upload, and nothing happens. I've discovered that if I upload it to an empty posting window, and then cut and paste that html into my drafted, ready-to-go post, it works like a charm. Another solution would be not to write so much, but what's the fun in that?

At the bottom of your posting window, there is a little line that reads "post and comment options." Click on that and you can adjust your time and date to reflect the day you assign. For instance I post my TT and MM the night before, but have often drafted and saved them a week in advance where they stay in draft mode but with the correct date so I can revise and think about them. If I want my TT or MM to stay on top for my short attention span readers who don't want to hunt for them, I change the time of the later posts during the day so they come before. If you only post once a day, this is not a problem. But what's the fun in that?

blogging
blogspot

2254 Might be time to let go?

My children will tell you I was a hovermother--the eyes in the back of my head were on rotating antennae 24/7. I was everywhere at once. Our lives all would have been more peaceful if I'd just relaxed a bit (just as my mother told me). But I was in the novice tadpole class according to Sam Schulman's recent article "Letting Go." I'd be no match for today's parents--from the doorstep of the school to gymnastics, soccer, karate, piano, and dance. Tethered with cellphones, e-mail, text messaging? Sam reports that some college students are in touch with their parents by cellphone as many as 15 times a day.

"Yes, parents impart values. But values come from other useful sources, too. Hovering parents undermine the influence not only of other institutions like schools and churches but of peers. Being picked for a sports team, facing the first day at school or at a job, learning to handle the ups and downs of courtship, enduring the apprenticeship of almost any career--these are not only signs that our children are becoming independent adults, but acts of initiation that take them out of the family embrace and into the wider world.

The seemingly obvious notion that kids need to be left alone sometimes if they are to grow up has been so lost that more than one American university has been forced to station security guards outside freshmen orientation sessions to keep anxious parents out. There are no reports, encouragingly, of freshmen on the other side trying to pull their parents in."

parenting

2253 Soy products and fertility

As if we didn't have enough to worry about. Now we need to worry about soy based forumula? Apparently. There's a lot of women of child-bearing age who had soy formula as infants.

"Genistein, a major component of soy, was found to disrupt the development of the ovaries in newborn female mice that were given the product. This study adds to a growing body of literature demonstrating the potentially adverse consequences of genistein on the reproductive system. . .

The results of this study conducted by researchers at the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences (NIEHS), part of the National Institutes of Health, in collaboration with an investigator at Syracuse University, are published in the January [2006] issue of Biology of Reproduction. " Full story here.

There should be more coming out soon. The National Toxicology Program, Center for the Evaluation of Risks to Human Reproduction (CERHR) will hold an independent expert panel meeting on “Genistein and Soy Formula” on March 15-17, 2006, at the Radisson Hotel Old Town, Alexandria, VA. For more information check the Federal Register: http://ntp.niehs.nih.gov/files/GenisteinSoyMtg.pdf. The NTP is an interagency program headquartered at NIEHS.

soy products
fertility
reproduction

2252 Irish going home

Illegals going home? But this time it's the Irish. I didn't know we had such a small problem, but it was a big story in the LA Times, March 8. The Irish economy is booming; why shouldn't they go home if they are not here legally? Why is this story made to sound so pathetic and heart wrenching? I can still claim to be a bit Irish, although my Irish came in the 1730s and fought in the American Revolution. They beat the potato famine rush of the 19th century by over 100 years.

But in one of the unexpected effects of Sept. 11, Irish immigrants are leaving the United States in waves; they say the crackdown on illegal immigration, coupled with a booming Irish economy, has eliminated the advantages that drew them here.

Ten years from now, say activists pushing for immigration reform, there won't be Irish neighborhoods left in New York.

"Watch the various airlines heading for Ireland," said Adrian Flannelly, chairman of New York's Irish Radio Network, "and you can see the same type of grief and sorrow that there has been in the worst days of our history, where [immigrants] would leave everything behind them.

"The Irish in America are as old as America itself," he said. "In that sense, this is a disgrace."

Before dawn today, 17 buses were scheduled to leave Katonah Avenue for Washington, where Irish immigrants intend to press for passage of the Kennedy-McCain immigration bill. The legislation would allow all illegal immigrants to apply for legal status after paying their back taxes and working in the United States for six years.

The Irish government estimates that 25,000 of its citizens are living illegally in the United States, but immigration reform groups say the number is as high as 40,000.

The push to change U.S. immigration law came from Ireland, where politicians were hearing bitter complaints from voters whose relatives were living here illegally, said Niall O'Dowd, chairman and founder of the Irish Lobby for Immigration Reform. The group received a grant from the Irish government to pursue its mission.

"There's nowhere in the world where Irish citizens are more marginalized than the United States," said O'Dowd, publisher of the weekly Irish Voice.

The Irish-born population in the United States has been dwindling for years, from 251,000 in 1970 to 169,827 in 1990, according to the census. It has fallen sharply over the last four years, most notably between 2003 and 2004, when it dropped from 148,416 to 127,682.

Irish immigration
illegal immigration

2251 Self Help Books

The best thing that can be said about this genre is they sell. And sell. And sell. The sillier the title, the bigger the sales. I was in a bookstore today looking for a hard to find section and passed the self help section. I couldn't resist. I just had to jot down some of the titles.

• Sham; how the self-help movement made America helpless
  
• Why men never remember and women never forget
  
• The guide to picking up girls
  
• I used to miss him but my aim is improving
  
• Babe bible
  
• Life is short wear your party pants
  
• What's it like being you?
  
• Read my hips
  
• Why can't you shut up?
  
• You're wearing that?
  
• Do I look fat in this?
  
• The book of No

I'm guessing there is no advice in these books you couldn't get for free at this blog!

Playing tag with the cat

If you read this and you are a cat or have a cat, consider yourself tagged! HT St. Casserole. (Cute cat photo alert)



1. What's your favorite food?
I'll eat just about anything, but don't care much for stinky fishy canned cat food. I can hear cheese and always show up for that.
2. What is your favorite toy?
Shoe strings are nice, also apron strings. Mostly I just go after imaginery things.
3. What is your best trick?
I run through the house meowing after I eat.
4. What is your favorite human trick?
I entice them to kiss my nose through the banister. It never fails. I have them well trained.
5. What human rule do you break often?
Digging food out of the garbage disposal and sleeping on top of the white upholstered living room chairs.
6. What do you wish your human knew about you?
I wish they knew where I came from. I'm sure I have a pedigree somewhere and how I got lost and turned in at Cat Welfare is a very sad story.
7. What are you glad your human does NOT know about you?
I have my own blog and use the computer at night when they are asleep. I'm in the top ten at Truth Laid Bear and that would make my human jealous.

You are tagged!

Love from Whistle the Kitten

2249 Six months after Katrina

St. Casserole's neighborhood is slowly, slowly returning to normal and she has some happy things to report. It had been awhile since I visited, and was pleased to find:

"Our Pass Christian High School kids got prom dresses, accessories and tuxes from a high school in Connecticut.

The Humane Society of South Mississippi moved out of the Katrina damaged building into a great new facility. Grants, donations and labor from around the country came pouring in to help.

Our neighborhood Chinese restaurant re-opened and looks better than it did before the storm."

Her sense of humor is also in good shape. On Ash Wednesday she noted:

"Remember that March is Wear More Jewelry month so load it on. Keep your pedicures current and buy a new pair of shoes. Oh rats! It's Lent. Forget all that and get your purple on."

Katrina recovery

2248 Christians in a Jim Crow India

This week I came across the blog by LaughWrinkles who is a 21 year old Canadian protestant living in India on a mission assignment at a Catholic mission. She doesn't write often, but every story is riveting and educational. It is hard to imagine someone so young being so self-possessed and confident in her travels and strong in her faith--certainly not an image I have of myself at that age. In some ways it does remind me of the letters my sister Carol sent home about her year in Brethren Volunteer Service when she was 18. One, or I should say three, of the problems she encounters are prejudice against women, against westerners, and of course hostility toward Christians, who are a tiny minority and often of low caste.

When I posted her story at Church of the Acronym I received a comment from a blogger in India that included a story about a father in India whose daughter was killed (possibly a dowry dispute?). I was a little confused about the details, but looked at his website. Apparently there are new laws in India affecting the status of married women and custody of children and the right to abortion. The author finds these changes threatening. The English was difficult for me, so if you have another site to suggest, pass it along.

Meanwhile, in the January/February issue of Books and Culture there is an article, "The shackles of caste," about the Dalits of India. Although it's been over 50 years since the untouchable status was made unconstitutional, serious crimes against the lowest caste members still persist. Because India is a major player in the global economy and technically a "democracy," we need to care about this.

Prisoners of the Hindu caste system, India's 250 million Dalits face such indignities on a daily basis. According to Human Rights Watch, nearly 100,000 crimes of hate were committed against Dalits between 1994 and 1996 nationwide—including many cases of murder, rape, and assault as well as lesser crimes. Many more incidents were not reported. Observers believe that with the rise of rightwing Hindu fundamentalists in India, such attacks are increasing in frequency. And apart from physical assault, Dalits face systematic social, economic, and religious exploitation. India's pernicious caste system dwarfs South African apartheid, both in scale and in effect. Apartheid is gone, but caste remains.

A new book, Dalit Freedom—Now and Forever, chronicles the Dalits' ages-long plight. Written by an Indian Christian and supplemented by commentary from notable Dalit leaders, it issues a ringing call not only for political liberation but also for spiritual liberation. And it makes the case that these two freedoms go together. . .

The caste system is Jim Crow on steroids. While human-rights activists have campaigned against apartheid in South Africa and genocide in Rwanda, Sudan, and Serbia, they have had surprisingly little to say about caste in India. If divestment was the right approach in freeing blacks in Africa, why is it not in freeing Dalits in India, which is increasingly tied to the global economy? The upper castes reap almost all the benefits of globalization and thus would have to pay attention if economic sanctions over caste became an issue.

This relentless oppression undermines India's claim to be the world's largest democracy, just as the persistence of systematic racial discrimination in the United States long after the abolition of slavery flagrantly contradicted America's democratic ideals.

Dalits
Indian Christians
caste

2247 What was the key to real social distinction in early 19th century England?

Last night our book club met to discuss our current read, Mr. Darcy's Daughters, by Elizabeth Aston, a 2003 sequel to Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice.

"It is the year 1818, twenty-one years after the stirring events of PRIDE AND PREJUDICE. Mr Darcy and Elizabeth have gone to Constantinople, while their five daughters descend on the dangerous and dashing world of Regency London. The world is changing, but opportunities for women are limited, as intelligent,
independent-minded Camilla soon discovers - and Society is unforgiving of those who transgress its rules.

The sisters are assailed on all sides by the temptations of London, with its parties and balls, gossip and scandals, intrigues and schemes, not to mention the inevitable heartbreaks arising from proximity to so many eligible - and ineligible - men." Orion book site

We had a great turn out and a lively discussion. Our discussion leader last night is a teacher of high school Spanish and English and came well prepared with a "pre-test." She had a list of 25 questions about the era on understanding the social etiquette of early 19th century England. As her source, she brought along a title none of us had seen, and it is a treasure for figuring out certain references, What Jane Austen ate and Charles Dickens knew. The answer to my above question is land ownership, and that was taken from her list.

Although everyone agreed a sequel is never as good as the original, even those who enjoyed the story (I did) thought it was a bit contrived to have Mr. Darcy and wife Elizabeth (main characters of Pride and Prejudice) take off for a year abroad so the 5 daughters could live in London with relatives during the "season."

Our hostess had never read Pride and Prejudice, so she'd also purchased and read that as well as our selection and declared it the best novel she'd ever read--and she's been in this group for 25 years. Another member who'd read it in college over 40 years ago said the same thing. Guess I'll have to read it.

Aston has written two other books about the Darcy family, Exploits and adventures of Miss Alethea Darcy, and The true Darcy Spirit, just released this year. The selection for April is, The Magdalene Gospel by Mary Ellen Ashcroft.

Jane Austen
Pride and Prejudice
book clubs

Monday Memories

Monday Memories
Did I ever tell you about
How my Grandparents lived in the 1920s?
My grandparents, living on a farm in Ogle County, Illinois, in the 1920s (many years before I was born), were far better prepared to deal with any disaster that involved interruption of basic services by a blizzard, tornado or terrorist attack than I am. They were not technology-dependent, they didn't see themselves as victims, and some of their children didn't even know they were poor.

My grandparents were tenants on a farm that didn't have running water or electricity. They used corn cobs in the kitchen cook stove and coal or oil in a space heater for the main room. All water for cooking, cleaning and bathing was drawn from a cistern. They owned an automobile which had an engine most men and boys of that era knew how to repair. Illinois did not yet license drivers, so even children drove cars if they were tall enough. They had a crystal radio and kerosene lamps. Their draft horse was available for bad weather days when the unpaved roads were impassable. A small gasoline motor powered some simple machinery, like the washing machine, and clothes were hung outside to dry. Outdoor privies weren't pleasant, but they did the job--smelly in the summer and chilly in the winter and the Sears Roebuck catalog could be used for light reading or toilet paper.

My grandmother always canned enough beans, corn and tomatoes from the large garden to get the family through the winter months; root crops like carrots, onions, turnips and potatoes were stored in the cellar; the few dairy cows supplied the family with milk, cream and butter, and the extra milk and male calves were a cash crop to buy items not raised on the farm like sugar and flour; hogs were butchered with the help of neighbors to make sausage, bacon, hams, chops and lard; cows were not butchered, so they didn't eat beef; the chickens laid eggs, and the tough, older hens later were served over biscuits.

Although they raised nine children, my grandparents never sent anyone to the doctor or hospital. None of the children were vaccinated and antibiotics hadn't been invented yet. When a new baby arrived, the older children went to the neighbors to spend the night and the doctor came to Grandma. All of the children worked at jobs appropriate for their ages--taking care of babies, setting the table, drawing water, cleaning the house, washing dishes, weeding the garden, swatting flies (no screens), feeding cattle, chopping wood, mucking stalls, or helping younger children by being their mother's eyes (my grandmother was blind). No need for Grandma to be a soccer mom--the children were too busy being essential to the family. That probably took care of self esteem worries too. My father was the oldest and he didn’t remember any toys, not even a bike or a baseball bat. However, there were always other children around to play with--siblings, cousins and neighbors--so Grandma didn't need a calendar to track their social activities.

When the children needed clothes, aunts and cousins would drop by to help with the sewing using a foot pedal sewing machine, catching up on the family news and gossip. There wasn't much variety at meal time, but the gravy could be watered down if the dinner table included a less fortunate visitor, as it often did. Not too far down the road was the little Pine Creek Church of the Brethren the children attended with their mother and they were educated in a one room school.

My grandparents, who died in 1983, loved every 20th century advancement that made their life easier--perhaps appreciated them more than the grandchildren and great-grandchildren (there are over 100 of us). Grandma, who nursed all her babies, thought women were crazy not to bottle feed if they could. They were "early adapters" in some areas and owned a car and a radio long before many of their neighbors. About 10 years after leaving the farm, they built a Lustron home, the ultimate in modernity in 1950 with radiant heat and built-in appliances and furniture. You would never have been able to convince them that life was better “in the old days.”

Links to Other Readers and Monday Memories
1. Bonita in Montana, 2. Joan who loves English and is learning Spanish, 3. D. who is getting a new template soon, 4. Ladybug, 5. Veronika transplanted to the midwest,
6. Katherine with the lovely smile, 7. Jeremy, 8. Nancy, 9. Dawn, 10. Beckie riding her bike, 11. Rowan and her baby, 12. MamaKelly and her baby, 13. Shelli and her Prince, 14.

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2245 Signs of the times

The growing fields of pediatric obesity and pediatric otolaryngology. I collect first issues of journals. I'm really sorry that this one is the new sign for our times. It is not in my collection, and I don't think I'll write Taylor and Francis to ask for it.

The International Journal of Pediatric Obesity is a new, peer-reviewed, quarterly journal devoted to research into obesity during childhood and adolescence. The topic is currently at the centre of intense interest in the scientific community, and is of increasing concern to health policy-makers and the public at large.

The aim of the International Journal of Pediatric Obesity is to rapidly establish itself as the leading journal for high quality papers concerned with:

• Epidemiology and population-based studies of overweight in childhood
  
• Clinical management of overweight and obese children and adolescents
  
• The recognition and treatment of co-morbidities linked to pediatric obesity
  
• Measurement and diagnostic issues in assessing child adiposity.
  
• And so forth here.

The International Journal of Pediatric Obesity will be available in both print and online versions and the first issue will be published in March 2006.

The journal is owned by the International Association for the Study of Obesity, a not-for-profit charitable body linking over 50 regional and national associations with over 10,000 professional members in scientific, medical and research organisations."

And USA Today has a very disturbing article about parents in their 40s so addicted to their music downloads at dangerous decibels that they are risking not only their own hearing but that of their children. The story features Pete and Judy Nelson and their 13 year old twins--the poster family for deafness or at least impaired hearing. As I've mentioned several times at this blog, my blind grandmother told me her hearing loss (which she experienced in her late 80s) was a worse disability than the loss of her eyesight which happened in her teen years.

Listening to MP3s at 120 decibles is way over the damage caused by a chain saw or a pneumatic drill. I considered this child abuse. The parents are totally irresponsible, not only with their own hearing, but their children's.

2244 Ovinephobia

Fear and horror of all things relating to sheep. That's why Brokeback didn't get the Oscar nod. The media kept calling them "cowboys" when they were shepherds. An easy mistake, I suppose when your top 5 contenders are Hollywood's idea of decades old morality tales. They couldn't cast two gay guys to play shepherds cowboys or a transsexual actress to play Felicity Huffman's role? What kind of a discrimination business are they running on the left coast? Where's Tab Hunter and Richard Chamberlain when you need them?

We were in Westerville last night visiting friends from church (if I had to drive 40 minutes to get to church, I'd change memberships), so I didn't know who won at the 78th Academy Awards until this morning when I picked up USAToday. To tell you the truth, I would have missed it even it I'd been home; I thought it was next week.

2243 Was there no way to stop her

from killing her little girl? Six year old Abigail Gilda Volpe was killed by her drunk mother in a pick-up truck that rammed a tree not far from here last Wednesday. Another driver notified the police and was following the erratic driver reporting on what she was doing. I believe I heard on the news that Kelly Volpe had 11 DUIs. The news story said she had no license and her husband had removed the plates from the car and taken the car keys, but somehow she was driving AND drinking at the same time. WBNS story here.

I'm wondering where our vigilant county children's services was. The woman obviously had a record that screamed "I'm incompetent and might kill my child." In another story that's been all over our newspapers for months, a couple lost custody of their 11 special needs children because they had chicken wire around their beds (called cages in the news stories). All those children were taken from their parents (who are trying to get them back) and placed in foster homes. Why wasn't little Abigail taken from the home for protection if her father couldn't protect her from her mother? A drunken parent is a lot more dangerous for a child than one who keeps a handicapped child restrained.

From March 4 Columbus Dispatch: Since the crash that killed 6-year-old Abigail Volpe last week, Perry Township Police Chief Robert Oppenheimer has looked at her mother’s arrest record with anger and disbelief. Dating to the 1980s, it includes at least six drunken-driving convictions, repeated license suspensions, convictions for forging drug prescriptions and a host of other traffic offenses.

A week after the Feb. 24 wreck, Oppenheimer said he and his officers continue to sort out Kelly Volpe’s string of court appearances and convictions. He has found paperwork for six drunken-driving convictions; he thinks there are eight. When Volpe crashed shortly before 8 that night, her license was suspended.

"I guess my question is, what is she even doing behind the wheel?" he said. "Nothing’s worked for her, and look what happened: She killed somebody.
"Somewhere along the line, you have to bang ’em so hard they’re not going to do it." . . Yesterday, Abigail’s small casket sat next to pink and purple balloons at Holy Trinity Lutheran Church in Upper Arlington.

"It’s really broken our hearts to see a little innocent thing die," Oppenheimer said.

2242 Appalachian Heritage Sunday

was celebrated last Sunday at St. John's Episcopal Church on W. Town Street. There are 40 counties in the Episcopal Diocese of Southern Ohio that are in Appalachia. A lot of Columbus speaks with a soft southern drawl. They gathered in the children and grandchildren for a rememberance of their roots.

2241 You've probably met Mr. Pyle

Whether you're a teacher, or a librarian, or a store manager, or a supervisor of a brake shop, you've got one of these guys to deal with. They make going to work generate thoughts of changing jobs. This one happens to be a special ed teacher. He's always expecting someone else to be doing his job.

"The guy is a poster child for what is wrong with a minority of teachers, specifically in special education. Teaching is hard work, no doubt about it. Most of us roll up our sleeves and go to work doing many thankless tasks. But there are some who will whine and complain about every single thing and then wonder why they don’t get paid more. It’s for the kids. We serve them and their parents, not the other way around."

However, The life that chose me will certainly give you a new appreciation for special ed teachers. To see what his "typical day" is like scroll to the bottom of this page.

2240 My navel and my jaw

Looking through vocal sites on the internet, I came across The Vocalist.org site with all sorts of drop down windows and some instructions on breathing, and listening, and exercising. I think I know how to think about my jaw, but I've never had to imagine my navel, except maybe when pregnant when it was moving on ahead of the rest of my body. Therefore, I'm having some difficulty figuring out just where this pipe organ is.

"The two places to think about are:

Lower abdomen
Jaw

All the support should come from the lower abdomen. That's where it should all be "happening". Think about anything above the navel as a huge flexible organ pipe. You shouldn't be doing anything conscious with muscles above the navel until you get to the jaw. Everything in between should work on its own without your intervention if you get the lower abdomen working (this is an oversimplification - but let's stick with it at the moment - basically, what you're going to do above the navel and below the jaw has more to do with POSTURE and allowing things to do what they do naturally by NOT trying to interfere than with actively trying to control anything - INCLUDING the diaphragm).

The jaw needs to work like a well-oiled hinge. This means no rigidity, no tension, no clamping shut nor forcing too far open. The tension you feel in your throat, I am willing to bet, is due in large part to tension in the jaw and the back of the tongue ("throat" tension usually means back of tongue tension, which is directly influenced by jaw tension). Secondarily, if your chest is "collapsed" rather than lifted (not forced up muscularly, but *lifted* - a sense that you're gently lifting the breastbone off the top ribs - if you think of your rib cage as an accordion, think about keeping it stretched apart, rather than squeezed together - but the feeling should be, as I said, one of LIFT, rather than anything involving really stretching, which implies tension).

If the chest is up and the support is active below the navel, you'll find that mysteriously the jaw doesn't want to work as hard to articulate vowels and consonants."

The Vocalist

2239 Encounter at the coffee shop

The Roast Mistress is chatting again at the coffee shop--about a book. Go figure! And Rosabelle has a message for the government about her pantry.

2238 Her Daddy

"My daddy had one true love in his life. He fell in love when he was 12 years old, and now, at 67, he still loves with all his heart and soul, this one passion that has been by his side ever since. Her name is alcohol. She is beer. She is brandy. She is very little else, but that is enough. It encompasses enough to satiate his need for her. He never cheats on her or abandons her. He holds her in the highest esteem and protects her with all his ability. He will do anything to ensure her safety, her presence, and her love for him. He left his wife for her. He left his children for her. Oh how he loves her! And he thinks she loves him." Read her whole post here.

How sad to have wasted his whole life and disappointed all who knew him.

2237 Yes, we've been here before

A reader at Victor Davis Hanson's site asks if there has ever been such a pathology as today where the intelligence services leak information to the opposition via the media, and he replies:

"I think at times in the Civil War the Copperheads in 1864 engaged in activity and disclosed information that was designed to harm the Union cause and force a stalemate that might bring them into power. In addition, there were a number of Confederate sympathizers in the government and military that were hardly careful in handling classified material. And their opposition to Lincoln also was grounded in a hatred of abolitionists and equity between the races. At times in WWII the Press hounded Patton to such an extent after Sicily that America lost its most gifted commander just when we needed him most in Italy in early 1944. And of course you remember Vietnam, when there was not merely leaks from intelligence agencies, but prominent Americans who ventured to Hanoi, lied about the terrible conditions faced by American P.O.W.s, gave propaganda lectures for the enemy, and did all they could to lose the war. My first memory as an incoming freshman at UC Santa Cruz in 1971 was walking into the dorm and seeing two Viet-Cong flags with Uncle Ho posters at the end of the hallway. So, yes, we've been here before."

2236 The voice of experience: why we don't hear from moderate Muslims

Minh-Duc is a Buddhist, but says he knows why we don't hear from the moderate Muslims about the Danish cartoon follies.

"Those who claim, that because there is no uproar of opposition against fundamentalism from Muslim, that there is no moderate Muslim, have never lived in an oppressed tyranny. This is the equivalence of the argument from the Left (made during the Cold War) that because there is no protest against Communism behind the Iron Curtain, the Worker Paradise is truly a paradise.

The reason moderate Muslims are so quiet is the same reason we victims of Communism were so quiet – fear. For 15 years, I lived under the tyranny of communism; and for those 15 years, I said nothing. My father said nothing, my neighbors said nothing, and my (then) countrymen said nothing. In fact, if a Western journalist asked me a question about the government, I would have nothing but glorious praise for the Communist government. Of course, I would not believe what I said. We had food shortage; our lives were miserable and oppressive. But miserable as we were, we preferred living in misery to death and imprisonment. My family and I were terrified, and being terrified is a forgivable sin.

The majority of Muslims are afraid – and they have every reason to be fearful." Read the entire piece.

Minh-Duc, State-of-Flux is newly linked here.

2235 I used to think I was the only one with a Sad Story. I was wrong.

That's one of the things Tom McMahon has learned in the 15 years since his 8 year old son Ryan had a brain injury leaving him unable to walk or talk or feed himself. Most of the things he's had to learn are pretty wrenching. Like how slow time can go, or how all Ryan's classmates have gone on, or how the friends he thought would be there for him weren't. ". . . don't you remember somebody you need to send a card to? Or make a phone call to? Or visit? You don't need to be brilliant, or wonderful, you just have to be there. You can do this. Off you go now!"

A very thought provoking piece.

Business Crude

Americans have never been known for their manners and etiquette, but apparently electronic communication has made this worse. I remember when we were taught in high school how to write polite business letters. Anyone remember, 1) date, 2) inside address, 3) greeting/salutation, 4) paragraph or two of information, 5) closing, 6) signature? Badaunt gives examples of trying to help friends doing business overseas (she's from New Zealand and lives in Japan):

"The U.S. is the worst in terms of simple business etiquette, and I can't blame email for this. On one memorable occasion before we had email, a response to a fax I sent was my own fax sent back with a scrawled, difficult-to-read note in the margin and an arrow pointing to the question it was answering. The question was answered, but showing it to our client was embarrassing, it was so unprofessional. This was an extreme example, but unbusinesslike responses are not unusual. The tone is not professional, questions are not answered fully, and most of the time if there is more than one question they are not answered at all.

The same goes for companies in the U.K.. People apparently do not read emails to the end, and nor do they read them properly. Responses from the U.K. tend to be more professional in tone, but the content is no better."

She gives some suggestions:

1. PLEASE LEARN TO READ AND WRITE. Alternatively, hire somebody who can. A person who can compose professional, businesslike letters addressing your clients concerns in full will do wonders for your company's image in the international business world.

2. PLEASE DO NOT PUT UP A WEBSITE WITH A SPECIAL FORM FOR ENQUIRIES IF YOU HAVE NO INTENTION OF RESPONDING TO THE ENQUIRIES YOU ARE SENT.

2233 ACLU screening at the Columbus Metropolitan Library

The local paper notes that the Columbus Chapter of the ACLU of Ohio will screen their religious liberty files TV series at the Columbus Metropolitan Library featuring well-known actors, comedians and activists who share their beliefs. Yawn. Bleh. Sigh.

But here's some interesting information on Christians and the courts at the Volokh Conspiracy. Prof. Greg Sisk, who teaches law and religion, guest blogged a 3 part series called, "Explaining Why Traditionalist Christians are at a Disadvantage in Making Religious Liberty Claims in Court" which in turn relies on his law review article, "How Traditional and Minority Religions Fare in the Courts." His thesis of his article:

" . . when compared with other religious claimants, when examined within the particular venue of the federal courts, when evaluated in the context of other potentially influential variables, and when evaluated through data drawn from recent litigation controversies, the hypothesis that minority religious adherents are more likely to lose and that the Christian faithful are more likely to win religious liberty claims is of doubtful continuing validity. Accordingly, as the new century unfolds, the more interesting inquiry may be why those whose religious practices and values fit most comfortably within the mainstream Christian tradition find themselves with a higher hill to climb than people of unconventional beliefs when seeking judicial exemption from secular regulation or judicial recognition of expression and equality rights. Is our nation's concept of religious liberty sufficient robust to encompass those whose claims of conscience may directly challenge the cherished orthodoxies of modern secular liberalism?"

His guest blog appears in several parts with a conclusion commenting on the comments, between February 27 and March 3, 2006 here with 72 comments, here with 88 comments, here with 59 comments, here with 87 comments, and here with 14 comments, 2 hours after it was posted.

Of his critics, he writes: "Most critics parted ways with me on how to characterize the finding that Catholics and Baptists were less likely to succeed in court. I suggest typical claims by Catholics and Baptists—seeking exemption from anti-discrimination rules, licensing and regulatory requirements, etc.—were a shot right across the bow of the liberal ship of state. Critics retort that these anti-discrimination or regulatory provisions advance compelling public interests that admit to no exception. I respond that they are conflating the merits—and thus the scope of religious liberty—with ideological or cultural preferences. And ‘round we go."

So, if you've got a free afternoon, it will be interesting reading. Probably more valuable than watching an ACLU screening.

ACLU
religious liberty

2232 Thinking ahead

Be sure to stop by next week for Monday Memories and Thursday Thirteen. I'm thinking ahead. At this time, I've decided to write about why my grandparents in the 1920s were better prepared for a disaster than I am in the 21st century (hint: lack of technology). In 1993 I interviewed my father about his growing up years, and learned things I'd never heard before--like he grew up on a farm. Sure, I knew where he lived--I'd been past it once on a drive in the country, but I had no idea they were actually farmers. I'd only known my grandparents when they lived in town while my grandfather worked at a printing company or was retired. I wrote it up (about 7 pages single spaced)and distributed the story to various family members at a reunion that year. Then after 2001 I looked at it again and realized there were many advantages to living low-tech, and so I'm looking at it yet again for Monday Memories.

Then for Thursday Thirteen I think I'll write about 13 reasons I like a new activity I'm in. So far, I've just taken a few notes but it seems to be humming along, and I'm having such a good time it shouldn't be hard to come up with 13.

Here's the painting I'm working on in art class--obviously not finished yet, so don't twist your neck too far. But it's been a lot of fun chatting via e-mail with Sylvia (who is not in the painting but is in the photo it is based on) and JoElla. Each of us saw something different. I immediately noticed I was wearing a bracelet, a gift from my Sunday School teacher Mrs. Green "back home." I was the new kid in town, so I think it was my way to say, "I'm not from these parts." The reason I can remember it is that it was probably my only one. I'd forgotten that my mother always had an array of ribbons for our braids to match our dresses. In the photo, there is no cat, but JoElla had a cat that is probably the ancestor of most cats in Forreston, Illinois, so I added in "Butch." I need to put some dots on Jo's dress and work on the skin tones So unless I ruin it between now and next week, you should see the finished piece soon.



Thursday Thirteen
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watercolor

Thursday Thirteen

13 things NORMA will tell you about this Thursday
I've been reading scary news stories about new infectious diseases the antibiotics can't fight anymore. I wondered if I had 13 illnesses and injuries I could recall--and it was a reminder of how things have changed since I was a kid. Here are 13 diseases/conditions I've had in my life time, most before antibiotics and vaccines.

The first seven items on the list didn't require a trip to the doctor in the 1940s and 1950s, because in those days, the doctor came to our house. With four little children, Mom certainly considered that a blessing. Also, "well-baby" check-ups hadn't been invented yet (no one had health insurance), and mothers weighed their babies at home. Medical care was pay-as-you-go except for catastrophic illnesses--and my dad bought polio insurance a few weeks before my sister came down with it.

1. Tonsillitis. Before the age of 5 when my tonsils were removed, I was constantly sick with infected tonsils, burning up with fever with painful sore throats. I was miserable. You don't hear a lot about this today, but surgery sure did the trick for me and it was a new lease on life and probably made life a lot easier for my mother.

2. Whooping cough. This is called pertussis today and children receive vaccinations for it with diphtheria and tetanus vaccines. It is a bacterial disease, and if one child got it, usually everyone did. It is more dangerous for girls than for boys. Although children used to die from this, I don't recall being aware of its seriousness. Still, once you've heard that cough, it is hard to forget it--like coughing through a tuba.

3. Chicken pox. Although it could have serious side effects, this disease was usually just allowed to run its course through the family. Kids just stayed home until the scabs fell off. Even if you've had chicken pox, the virus can stay in your body and reappear as shingles and is extremely painful.

4. Mumps. I remember having this in kindergarten. Painful ear ache. By the time my children came along, there was the MMR vaccine.

5. Measles. It wasn't unusual to get this more than once. Probably 90% of people my age had this; now because of MMR immunization, almost no one gets measles.Ruebella is the serious form especially for pregnant women.

6. Scarlet fever. Right after third grade let out in May, I got this. I became sick at a friend's house and her mother called my Mom to come and get me. What a way to start summer vacation! This is a strep infection.

7. Pneumonia. I think this was 7th grade, and antibiotics weren't common, but house calls still were because I remember opening an eye and seeing the doctor in my bedroom.

8. Asian Flu. Freshman in college. This was a pandemic starting in China, killing about 2 million, and although there was a vaccine, I didn't seem to know about it. There wasn't much they could do since most of the campus had it, so we just stayed in our dorm rooms and sipped 7-Up. It disappeared and then evolved into the Hong Kong flu in 1968.

9. Infectious mononucleosis. Sophomore in college. Because it is communicable (known as the kissing disease since so many teens get it), I was put in the student hospital for a week. This is very common and most people have had a mild case by the time they reach adulthood, but sometimes you get really sick.

10. Appendicitis. I was about 33 years old, and they weren't really sure what I had until they got in there and looked. I healed pretty fast, but it took months for my son to get over it--I think he was in first grade and he would run after the car sobbing when I dropped him off at school.

11. Aches and pains. My horse fell on me when I was 12 years old starting a long history of back trouble, but for real pain you need a pulled neck muscle. Sounds silly but one day I turned around in the car to back out of our very long drive-way and pulled something. I discovered that every part of your body seems to be connected to your neck, even your fingernails. Worse than any back trouble I'd ever experienced.

12. Atrial fibrillation. Although this wasn't diagnosed until 1996, I was apparently born with an extra circuit in my heart, which caused the electrical charges to misfire with rapid and irregular heart beats. Because I'd always had it, I didn't know anything was wrong (I thought the room went black for everyone from time to time when standing up or walking up stairs quickly) and it never happened during a medical exam. It could have killed me or caused a serious stroke. It was ablated in 2002 and now seems to be OK even without meds.

13. Rotator cuff. When I was in rehab for this in 2000 I got to meet a lot of huge athletes and dainty dancers, but the best I can figure (I'm not athletic at all) is it was years and years of lifting heavy journals in the library and then smacking my weakened shoulder on the side mirror of a car.

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Ash Wednesday

The choir sang "Wondrous Love" (arr. Alice Parker & Robert Shaw) and then had rehearsal after the service, which was lovely. Although things are a bit cramped in the choir loft, I love sitting so close to the piano and organ (probably 3 ft.). There was a clarinet solo during the offering (Adagio by Tomaso Albinoni) and I was close enough to read her music. Just delightful. But I'm definitely going to move to the alto section.

From the bulletin: "Ash Wednesday is the beginning of the season of Lent--a time of renewal and coming back to God. It comes as an intrusion as we face the reality that we are going to die. "Remember, you are dust, and to dust you shall return." These words echo the service at the grave--"dust to dust." This forceful reminder of our sinfulness and human frailty. It is a time of dying to ourselves and being crucified with Christ. And as surely as we have died with Him, so we will be raised with Him to the glord of God."

2229 Would the internet lie?

I took a cybertest for a personality DNA (I think it is a reworded Myers-Briggs) and was quite surprised to see I was a "genuine architect." I suppose they don't have enough personality types for librarians to have it show in the database, or I've been retired too long.

It made for interesting dinner conversation last night with my architect husband who thinks of me as disorganized and indecisive. That's how a true architect sees things. I told him it was probably his influence of 45 years. Also he reads more and is better informed about politics and religion than he used to be, so maybe I'm rubbing off on him too. A few more years and we'll have this relationship stuff all worked out. The test gives suggestions for changes, which I will ignore, given my personality type. Goals? You've got to be kidding!!!

personalDNA

Genuine Architect

Your preference for concrete, visually pleasing things, combined with your confidence and your respect for order make you an ARCHITECT.

You are logical and detail-oriented, which allows you to get things done efficiently.

You are quite sure of yourself, so that you tend to know the best ways of doing things.

Your eye for aesthetic beauty and style indicates that you know a lot about design.

Having a routine and sticking to it is important to you; you find comfort in tradition and familiarity.

Self-reliance is something in which you take great pride—you are confident and down to earth.

You have a basic faith in yourself in many areas of your life, allowing you to be self-assured when facing challenges.

You do your own thing when it comes to clothing, guided more by practical concerns than by other people's notions of style.

Generally, you believe that you control your life, and that external forces only play a limited role in determining what happens to you.


Your outgoing personality, your preference for order, and your cautious appreciation of others makes you GENUINE.

You aren't afraid to be the center of attention. Actually, it is quite the opposite: You are comfortable and confident in social situations.

As a charismatic kind of person, you tend to be energized by other people and enjoy their company.

When other people are upset, you are able to think about the situation rationally, without getting too caught up in their feelings.

At times you find it difficult to understand where other people are coming from, and wish they could just see things the way you do.

You are a strongly principled person who believes in right and wrong. This helps you make decisions easily when it comes to moral issues – you don't have to waste time hedging on important values.

In your experience, people tend to get what they deserve. So, you work hard and try to follow your principles in your day-to-day life, knowing that you will be rewarded for your efforts.

2228 Chocolate Peanut Butter Cream Cheese Tart with Caramelized Bananas

A mouthful in more ways than one. We watched Spencer Budros, a Certified Pastry Chef/Owner of Pistachio in Columbus' short north area make this yesterday afternoon at the Columbus Home and Garden Show at the Fairgrounds. It was the 50th anniversary of this show, so the theme was "The 50s." The peanut butter and banana dish was to honor Elvis Presley who liked peanut butter and banana sandwiches. We also saw a 1949 Chevie with plants growing out of its headlights and dashboard, tastefully planted in an abstract garden.

I must say, this was a fabulous dessert--we all got a generous helping after the demo. We missed a lot of the "how-to" although we were very attentive. Some of the mixing was done off camera, and sometimes all we could see was the back of Mr. Budros' head as he leaned over the stove (camera was positioned above him). I think it probably takes a lot of practice to be a TV chef and not step in front of the main event. Also, we couldn't see the 1950s style kitchen that was behind him--and I sure don't remember any red refrigerators.

We also got a free cook book, "Gourmet Galaxy Cafe Cookbook" put together I think by Doral Chenoweth (at least he wrote the bios), who used to write "The Grumpy Gourmet" column for the Columbus Dispatch. Mr. Budros' pastry shoppe is for the busy family or business who likes to buy desserts when throwing a party--at any time you can find 50 fancy items in his case. However, if you're all done cleaning the toilets and setting the table, you can whip this little number up. But set aside generous amounts of time for the chocolate shortbread dough chilling and flame throwing for the bananas.

Update: I requested and received permission from Pistachio to post the recipe:

Yield: 10 individual 3 1/2" tartlettes

Chocolate Shortbread:
1 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/3 cups confectioners sugar
1/4 cup cocoa powder
pinch of salt
1 teaspoon baking powder
3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks) unsalted butter, room temperature
2 eggs
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Combine flour, sugar, cocoa powder, and salt in electric mixer bowl. Add better and mix on low speed with paddle attachment until mealy. Add eggs and vanilla. Mix on low speed until just combined--do not overmix! Remove dough from bowl. Lightly flour and wrap in plastic. Refrigerate for one hour. Roll dough to approximately 1/3 inch thick; cut or stamp 5 inches round. Form dough into 10 individual 3 1/2 inch tartlette rings. Bake with pie weights for 10 minutes. Remove pie weights. Bake for an additional 5 minutes or until set. Cool and store at room temerature.

Semisweet Chocolate Ganache:
1/2 cup heavy cream
6 oz. semisweet chocolate, finely grated (1 cup)

Finely grate approximately 6 ounces of semisweet chocolate; place in medium-size mixing bowl. Bring 1/2 cup heavy cream to a boil. Pour boiling cream over grated chocolate. Mix until smooth. Cool at room temperature.

Peanut Butter Cream Cheese Filling:
1 package (8 oz) cream cheese
1 cup granulated sugar
1 cup Krema unsalted creamy peanut butter (this is a local, natural brand)
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup heavy cream

Blend cream cheese and granulated sugar using paddle attachment in electric mixer until smooth. Add peanut better, salt and vanilla extract. Mix until smooth. Transfer mixture to a small bowl. In a mixer bowl, whip heavy cream to a soft peak. Add peanut butter cream cheese mixture to the whipped cream and mix on medium speed until smooth.

To Assemble:
10 chocolate shortbread tartlette shells, prepared (see above)
semisweet chocolate ganache, prepared (see above)
1 cup Spanish peanuts
peanut butter cream cheese filling, prepared
5 bananas, sliced (diagonal or oval shape)
1 stick unsalted butter, melted
1 cup sugar

Remove prepared, cooled chocolate tart shells from rings. Place onto sheet pan or work surface. Spoon one tablespoon of chocolate ganache into the bottom of each tart shell. Smooth with spatula to cover bottom of tart shell. Divide one cup Spanish peanuts equally among ten tarts--sprinkle over ganache. Spoon or pipe peanut butter cream cheese filling to fill tart shell. Cover filling with sliced bananas. Brush bananas with melted unsalted butter. Refrigerate until time to serve.

To serve:
Remove tarts from refrigerator. Sprinkle granulated sugar on top of bananas to cover. Use torch to caramelize. Serve immediately.

Norma's notes: He said that brushing the bananas with butter would keep them from discoloring and add a nice flavor. He used a high quality cocoa and semi sweet chocolate but I don't remember the brand--I just remember him stressing that. He also told us how to make our own pie weights out of beans, but best not to trust me on that one. I have no idea where you get the torch--he said something about going to the garage to get it, but I think that was a joke. It's not among my kitchen tools, nor are 5" tart rings. Just know this is a fabulous dessert--one I'll never make--considering how long it took to type it--but would buy.

Chocolate Peanut Butter Cream Cheese Tart
dessert recipes
banana recipes
Elvis Presley

2227 The daughter-in-law--taking applications

You've seen the reality show about the bachelor choosing a wife. Why couldn't there be a show called "The daughter-in-law?" I've thought of throwing a big party and inviting all the single women I know to meet my son--he'd be the only guy at the party (unfortunately, most are in their 50s and 60s, and one in her 80s). He has excellent manners and I'm sure would make them all feel special, but would probably not speak to me for awhile.

My idea of the perfect daughter-in-law is probably different than my son's idea of a perfect wife. Actually, in marriage there is no perfection, so let's just toss that word out, OK? Marriage is mostly enjoying the good qualities and accepting the flaws, your spouse's and your own. Marriage is smoothing out your own rough edges so you aren't always poking at each other. He says next time he'd like to be the boss; he wants to be only 50% to blame when there is a problem. Personally, I don't think that's the best attitude if he wants it to last longer than a week or two.

I would like her (my new daughter-in-law) to be a little bit like my friend Mitzi, who used to use her week-ends to help care for her husband's father. Not so unusual, you say? Well, she lived in Illinois and her father-in-law lived in Arizona. So I'd say she was one fabulous daughter-in-law. My father-in-law's other daughter-in-law, Kate, is another one who willingly stepped in to provide care when needed, but they lived in the same house.

I would also like her to be a little bit like my son-in-law, who is cuddly, funny, and available when we need help--like tomorrow he's coming over to move furniture so we can have carpeting installed on Thursday. He also cleans the house and does the laundry (at his house) and has a good job. She wouldn't have to be strong enough to move furniture, but it would be nice for my son if she liked to clean and do laundry (don't laugh, some women do) and was also the CEO of a Fortune 500 company.

I would also like her to be a bit like my former daughter-in-law who was a fabulous cook and hostess. We aren't party people, so having her around was always a blast, and being invited for dinner was marvelous. Once when I was in the hospital she brought in a great meal and also gave me a manicure! I would also like her to be smart like my niece-in-law, Leigh, who is brainy, but very easy to talk to. I would like my daughter-in-law to be active in her church like my niece-in-law Joan, who seems to have a wonderful group of supportive friends and helps with the youth group. My son is a Christian and has learned the meaning of being unequally yoked.

I also think it would be nice if she were as good to her own parents as our daughter is to us. God save us from a woman who "has issues" she's always working on. I just don't think we have enough time left on this earth for her to find herself. She should like living in the mid-west and not be pining for mountains or oceans all the time. Sharing holidays--would that be too much to ask for?

I'm sorry this list is getting a bit long and doesn't look very romantic, but my son, of course, is going to be looking for what men always look for, so I thought that department was covered and I'd just throw out some ideas.

Oh yes, and he likes to fish, plays the guitar, and has a dog and a cat. So we want someone outdoorsy with no allergies.

2226 The Meathead Economics

That's what the WSJ is calling the universal preschool tax which would cost Californians $23 billion over the next 10 years, if Rob Reiner's Proposition 82 passes. Rob Reiner, for those of you too young to remember, was the flaming liberal son-in-law of Archie Bunker in the TV series, All in the Family. He left Gloria and she raised their son alone (in another short lived series). Now he's just another limousine liberal from Hollywood, making money off poor schmucks who buy movie tickets.

First of all, there is no evidence whatsoever that sending poor kids to preschool puts them ahead in elementary or high school. It doesn't get them into college and good jobs. Billions of dollars spent on Head Start over 40 years have not shown any permanent gains, because when the lights have been turned out and the doors of the school locked at night, these kids go home to the old environment and the parent (usually just one, ala Gloria Bunker). When California preschools are universal, you can bet your bippy that Hollywood moms will be sending their little darlings to a private school or jet setting them around the world with nannies and tutors in tow. The middle class and the working poor will be footing the bill, not the rich.

Second, California already has confiscatory taxes, and long time permanent (and wealthy) citizens are moving out of state. They love their sunshine, but they love their wealth more. According to one pundit, you can buy a home in Nevada just with the the tax savings by moving out of California. When the rich leave a state, who is going to pay the bulk of the taxes? Well, the middle-class, of course, since the poor don't pay anything.

Third, Reiner is using tobacco tax money (intended for children) to promote his latest Meathead scheme, and it has been funneled into the pockets of the public relations firms who got those contracts to sell his scheme.

"Beware of liberals promising to tax someone else to help children" they really mean you.

November story from Orange Co. Register on the Meathead tax

Wall Street Journal article

2225 This calls for a bag of Fritos

Some of you munch chocolates when under stress; I scarf down Fritos.


I just finished looking over our income tax forms before they are mailed--federal, state, RITA (our suburb), and Columbus. Even with all the eyes we've had looking this over, we've had the wrong address for our business for four years! No one seemed to care.

I have a pension and my husband has Social Security but is finishing up a few jobs for long time clients. His income is negative, so that offsets our interest income; even with a negative income he still owes taxes on his Soc. Sec.; the auto expenses for business still have to be claimed, but the record doesn’t have to be submitted; medical expenses were well over $10,000 (more than half my income) because of insurance and Medicare costs and we had no illnesses--it‘s been one of our healthiest years; we have a small house on the east side (considered a rental for us) which on paper shows up at $420,000 for depreciation (!) and the reasons are just flat out bizarre, but I assume it is so you never get to zero like we did back in the 60s when we owned a duplex. Must be very beneficial to people who own acres of apartments. But this is little house.

Here's a rerun from what I wrote on Feb. 8, but nothing has changed.

In 1995 the total pages of federal tax rules were 40,500; in 2004, 60,044.

In 2000 the number of IRS tax forms were 475; in 2004 they were 529.

In 1994 there were 16 loopholes for education and training; in 2004 that had risen to 28.

In 1995, 50% of taxpayers used paid tax preparers; in 2003, 62%.

In 1995 Americans spent 5.3 billion hours filling out tax forms; in 2004, 6.5 billion.

In 1995 there were 84 pages in the 1040 instruction book; in 2003 there were 131.

To complete the 1040, A,B, and D schedules in 1995, it required 21.2 hours; in 2003 it took 28.5. [figures from CATO Handbook on Policy, p. 120]