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Watching Norman's Ark on Sunday morning Hallmark movie

What a travesty. Noah (1998) with Tony Danza. Fortunately there is a commentator on board at Hallmark, Kenda Creasy Dean.

For this morning's movie, I had to do more than suspend disbelief; I had to shackle it. The special effects look like my daughter's 7th grade science project: Heaven is a sexist phone company; the lion lies down with the lamb in cages that would send the SPCA into spasms; and nobody follows the Biblical script, starting with God.

That makes the story of Noah a perfect example of our tendency to tell the story of God in a way that will make us human beings look better. Norman may be a dishonest contractor; but God is the bad guy in this story, bent on an irrational flood to destroy petty people. That makes Norman the savior, not God; in fact, you could easily conclude that Norman saved his community from God-which is fine, if the movie had been named "Norman" instead of "Noah."

For Jews and Christians, the story of Noah isn't about God's meanness; it's about God's promise. In Genesis, after the flood, God sets a rainbow in the sky and tells Noah: "This will be a sign of my covenant between me and all creation. Never again will there be a flood to destroy the earth." My recommendation on NOAH? Read the book instead.

Yes, read the good book!