This morning in a class at church a retired teacher commented on the gay teen suicide epidemic. I told her there were no statistics to back up this claim that gay teens are bullied and then commit suicide. "Oh yes," she said, "I've attended workshops on this." Now that I believe. However, the so called statistics are urban legends and are from a jumble of bad information. This was disproved 8 or 9 years ago. Ritch Savin-Williams says gay teens are just as psychologically healthy as other teens and just as resilient.
Just like the phony "death by abortion" statistics we got in the 1960s, these are politically based and biased for a different agenda. Even one suicide, for what ever reason, is too many, but there is no gay teen suicide epidemic. As a demographic, gay men and women are very successful, the best educated and highest paid group in our society. I suspect that as teens they were rather resilient, smart and brave. . . maybe more so than other groups. Also, they do their share of bullying, of each other, and straight teens.
Do you know what is killing and maiming teen-agers at an alarming rate? Automobile accidents and sports injuries. Each Year over 5,000 teens ages 16 to 20 die due to fatal injuries caused by car accidents. About 400,000 drivers age 16 to 20 will be seriously injured. These are not urban legends--these are reportable, verifiable statistics, plus they are deaths that in many cases could be prevented if we had the collective guts to raise the driving age to 18! Snowmobiling, with speeds of 90 miles per hour and vehicle weights of more than 600 lbs., causes 200 deaths and 14,000 accidents yearly. And school buses? In 2002, 26 children ages 14 and under were killed, and in 2001 an estimated 4,500 were injured in school bus-related incidents. More than 40 percent of these deaths were child pedestrians.
What about dog bites? From 1979 to 1996, 304 people in the USA died from dog attacks and 30 in 2009 alone. How does that compare to deaths by suicide caused by bullying--a statistic that just doesn't exist?
How do you know a gay teen doesn't commit suicide from unrequited love--just like straight teens--he is madly in love with someone who rejects him. Because of his youth and inexperience, life seems without value and meaning. If he was teased or bullied on Tuesday and commits suicide on Thursday after a text message from his boyfriend who is dumping him, is it the bullying, the boyfriend, or his own insecurities?
Is There a Gay Teen Suicide Epidemic? | Homosexuality, Lesbian & Gay Teen Suicide, Sexual Orientation | LiveScience
Saturday, October 30, 2010
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20 comments:
Non-Hispanic white men age 85 or older have a suicide rate of 47 per 100,000; teenagers 15 to 19 — 6.9 per 100,000. Whose wringing their hands about the old white guys? Or are they expendable?
Murray sez:
Hey Anon, according to Obamacare they are expendable!
63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes so that probably has to be factored into depression, substance abuse, etc.
I don't know the numbers, but I really don't care. What I know is that young people who are gay have big problems as they grow up.
I saw it in my school in North Carolina 50 years ago,I saw it in the community where I lived and worked in Washington,DC.
If you don't see there is a problem your eyes and heart are closed.
There's quite a gulf between gay teens having problems, or being rejected by their parents or peers, and committing suicide because someone teases them. There is no epidemic!
What teenager doesn't have problems? 50 years ago where were gay support groups, gay characters on TV and movies, and books about gay teens? You are pathologizing homosexuality by making gay teens appear to be unhealthy, depressed, wimps who can't stand up for themselves! Essentially, you're suggesting gay kids go back in the closet because it's just too dangerous out here in the bad, bad world.
Gay teens probably hang out with other gay teens--that's who their primary relationships will be with. That's who they will date, that's who they will love, that's who will dump them. They will have problems and heartaches like any other teen. Hey--I know women who have been rejected by gay men--they didn't kill themselves.
Check out the gov't mental health page--there are about 10 reasons listed that MIGHT be causes--and gender identity doesn't make the list, but break up of parents' marriage and substance abuse does.
Very interesting post, Norma.
I live in Utah and not long back the second highest elder in the Mormon church gave a sermon denouncing homosexuality from a moral/scriptural context. (Disclaimer: I am Catholic myself)
The uproar caused by his statements included any number of gay support and human rights groups asking the LDS Church to recant this statement as it only causes greater angst for gay Mormons and raises the number of suicides accordingly, so they claim.
I find it sad when a religion is excoriated for preaching biblically taught morals. That being said, I think we still need to hate the sin but love the sinner, as that is also a part of scripture and the Christian faith.
I did a post on this in my blog.
My synod ELCA welcomes gay members--they are sinners saved by Christ's work on their behalf just like every one else. We have gay and lesbian pastors whose only requirement was they remain celebate. But that was too difficult (although Catholic priests have been doing it for centuries), too discriminating, so they have split the church over it, and then blamed the other side for being unloving and devisive.
Norma,
Here's the issue. We need to let go of the labels of "epidemic" or whatever everyone is disagreeing about and focus on the issue at hand, which is the fact that we are--and have been--losing our homosexual youth as a direct result of legalized oppression. Period. Whether it is suicide, hate crimes, or loss of quality of life, this has gone on too long. Reference this study from the SPRC from last year. Read the conclusion on page 46, and then tell me there is no cause for action: Take a look. Read the conclusion on page 45: http://www.sprc.org/library/SPRC_LGBT_Youth.pdf
Labels and statistics aside, here's the breakdown: "Normal" teenage problems, or getting made fun of because you are overweight, or short, or black, or white, or whatever makes you “different”…this is difficult for any child. (Note: gay people are also overweight, short, black, white, etc., so this bullying applies here too). However, ADD TO THAT the shame you are MADE TO FEEL for being gay…shame that is CONSISTENTLY underscored by the conservative moment in this country and passed from its leaders, to the communities, to the parents, to the children. Conservative groups send the messages loud and clear, from fighting to overturn equality-based legislation to campaigning AGAINST tolerance in our schools. Then ADD TO THAT things like the fear of being rejected by your family, or what’s worse, actually being rejected; Being abandoned by your peers and/or subjected to even MORE harassment; The inability to seek comfort in your own faith because its leaders (NOT GOD) have condemned you and are insisting that you are CHOOSING to be gay, and “being” gay is damnable, so therefore warning that you must sacrifice partnership and any hopes for a family of your own. I challenge you to parallel this type of SOCIETAL-INFLECTED pain on a child. This is what differentiates this group from the masses, and also why it is so insulting to continually read posts like yours questioning why we give this group special attention.
So let’s add this up: Let’s take an “awkward” 13 year-old who is a different ethnicity than the majority of other students in his school…maybe has glasses, or braces, is a little shorter than average, doesn’t wear the designer clothes that the other kids wear, is a different religion than most, is quiet, and is a good student. Odds are this child will most likely be picked on. That in and of itself is painful. Oh but wait…I forgot: He’s gay. So add to the mix: Increased loss of self-worth, instillation of self-hatred and shame, fear of possible–and too often actual–familial rejection, worries of possible social repercussions, additional harassment, bullying, isolation, homelessness (yes–that does happen), personal safety/security, religious abandonment, and warnings about any kind of “morally acceptable” future involving dating and companionship. Don’t think kids/teenagers experience this? Think again. How is anyone, much less a child, supposed to handle all of that? Studies are published from psychological groups and foundations (not one-off professors), and people refute them. Facts are presented, and people dispute them. You, like a million other Americans, are going to believe what you want to believe. And this Savin-Williams guy is unreal. His utopia-based sentiments are biased and completely out of line. You want honest feedback? Ask the people who have been living it--not from an ivory tower at Cornell interviewing well-off ivy league LGBT students--but those LGBT people living in rural middle America. Or down south. Or in conservative Republican suburbs. I have lived this for 20 years of my life. I know the stories. I have seen them first hand, and experienced them. We are the experts here, and I'm telling you, this is what is going on. This country needs to wake up.
*Correction from above: Page 45 is the summary page.
Also, I guess the CDC is wrong too?
http://www.cdc.gov/msmhealth/stigma-and-discrimination.htm
And the APA?
http://www.apa.org/about/governance/council/policy/discriminatory-legislation.aspx
Unreal.
Sorry, anon, we need to realize what epidemic means and we need to stop pathologizing gay teens and realize they are subject to the same relationship problems other teens have. They can get teased about acne and obesity, same as straight kids, and it just might be other gays doing it.
Most importantly, anon didn't commit suicide, nor does he know of any epidemic.
I don't know that you personally have experienced all that--being homely, overweight, ethnic, rejected by parents and church, but any rejection is difficult. The teenagers and adults that I have known who have committed suicide have all been white, middle class, straight, and popular with their peers, but obviously were struggling with thoughts and experiences known only to a few.
And I don't see your sorrow for a much greater risk group--elderly white men. I don't know that I'd call 47 per 100,000 an epidemic, but it's much closer to the definition than the tiny percentage of a small percentage for all teens.
And again, one is too many. The best support for anyone at risk comes from peers. If you'd been captain of the football team or lead in the senior play, and your boyfriend spurned you for another, you still would have been deeply hurt. But it's easier to blame "the other" or "they" and not your own.
Norma, I don't know where you are getting the idea that these suicides are relationship-based, having one's boyfriend "spurn you for another," but did you read anything I wrote? Did you read the information I attached? There is a population out there today that is being WILLFULLY and LEGALLY oppressed, and this prejudice and bigotry are causing LOSS OF LIFE. Do you understand this?? This is an issue where the words and actions of human beings are linked to the deaths of other human beings.
Epidemic is defined as "attacking or affecting many persons simultaneously in a community or area." Why exactly didn't this fit again? And why are you so adamant about negating this? And you have the audacity to point out the suicides of elderly white men? Can we stop the aging process and the depression that comes with getting older? And if focus groups began an awareness initiative, I certainly wouldn't be online posting blogs opposing it, claiming that if more older men read that we care about them and are trying to get a handle on their issue, they are going to thrown in the towel even more. What?? People like you are part of the problem here Norma. Open your eyes.
And to the anon person who commented that I didn't commit suicide: You don't know my personal story, so don't make irrelevant comments and assume you do.
Very sad world we live in.
Apparently you're not reading what I've written either. There is no epidemic (you have no numbers), and one is too many.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wx8SsFESyus
Elderly men are possessed by demons?
Jesus Christ says elderly men must be born again?
Death penalty for elderly men?
Being elderly not allowed to be taught about in schools?
Politicians campaigning to prevent elderly men from getting married, or serving their country openly, or receiving healthcare benefits from their lifelong partner?
Elderly men being rejected from their churches?
Stellar comparison.
Very funny (you thought), but not far off. The elderly are alternately ridiculed and ignored; they've lost many mental and physical abilities in a society that worships youth and health; their parents and friends have died; their children might live thousands of miles away pursuing their own interests and ignoring them; many have lost their eye sight/hearing interferring with communication; and the list goes on, but you obviously discriminate, have no elderly friends, and are probably thrilled at the thought of limiting access to medical care.
Norma,
I am 33 years old, currently unemployed because I had to reject a job with my company relocating me to New York so that I could remain local and care for my 75 year old parents. Even though I am now struggling, I help them financially because Medicare doesn't cover nearly enough of what it should. I have given up much of my own personal life to ensure they are not alone, and that the quality of their life is better. They live 90+ miles from me, but I take them to all of their doctor appointments, and make sure I get them to see their remaining siblings before they pass, and spend weeks at a time at their home. My heart bleeds for them daily. So yes, I am well aware of their struggles. The difference between you and is that I would never--ever--post a blog negating their issues. I have compassion for everyone.
And by the way, my father, who is 75 years old, has no idea that the man that does all of this for him is gay. If he did, I probably would not be welcome in his home. But I love him just the same.
Food for thought.
P.S. Gay people are elderly too, only we don't have kids, and husbands/wives, and spousal benefits to help us through our "golden" years. I know of older gay couples that have not even been allowed to see one another in the hospital as one was dying, and who have been left with NOTHING after their partner had passed. No social security. No home. Nothing.
So yes, Norma, again, I am well aware of the struggles of elderly men and women.
I don't know what decade you're talking about, but gay couples have been able to protect themselves and each other for many years now. It's called power of attorney, legal will, joint bank accounts, beneficiaries for pensions, annuities, life insurance etc. And in earlier times, I knew lesbians who simply designated each other as next of kin, sister, niece, cousin, etc. Even married couples, especially if there are children from a prior marriage, cannot rely on the gov't or employer to look after everything in protecting a spouse. And Social Security doesn't cover me because I have a teacher's pension.
I have said nothing negative about gay people or teens, I've presented the research, offered a sound understanding of an epidemic. But you are convinced I have and want to wallow in your self-pity and self-righteousness, so if that keeps you going during this difficult time in your life, I'll have to concede you know what is best for you.
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