Sunday, November 28, 2004

620 Doggie Humor

The Midwest Border Collie Rescue page is loaded with dog humor. My friends Syliva and Dave have Border Collies. Sylvia says they will actually try to herd cats. My son has a chocolate lab--his second--lost the first one (vanilla) to the wife. My brother is fond of Boxers. My friend Nancy used to have Goldens. My daughter's Chihuahua recently died at age 18. We have a cat. This has been around the internet many times, but has something for all of us.

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

GOLDEN RETRIEVER: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?

BORDER COLLIE: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

DACHSHUND: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

ROTTWEILER: Make me.

LAB: Oh, me, me!!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I?

GERMAN SHEPHERD: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

TIBETAN TERRIER: Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.

JACK RUSSELL TERRIER: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.

POODLE: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

COCKER SPANIEL: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

DOBERMAN: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.

BOXER: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark......

CHIHUAHUA: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

IRISH WOLFHOUND: Can somebody else do it? I've got this hangover.....

POINTER: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there....

GREYHOUND: It isn't moving. Who cares?

AUSTRALIAN SHEPHERD: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

OLD ENGLISH SHEEP DOG: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb.

HOUND DOG: ZZZZZZzzzzz.z.z.z..z..z..z...z

CAT: Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the question is: How long will it be before I can expect light?

And we all know about academic librarians and light bulbs: "How many academic librarians does it take to change a light bulb? Just five. One changes the light bulb while the other four form a committee and write a letter of protest to the Dean, because after all, changing light bulbs IS NOT professional work!"

If you live in Illinois or Wisconsin, these Border Collies may be looking for you.

1 comment:

Paula said...

That's hilarious, Norma!