- “So I procrastinate, it’s not like it’s hurting anyone!”
- “Enough about you, back to me.”
- “I deserve this, so I’m treating myself!”
- “If I can’t have it, she shouldn’t either.”
- “I’ll get around to it… or not.”
- “It’s not really gossip if it’s all true, right?”
- (And the granddaddy of them all) “But that doesn’t make me a bad person!”
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